January 12, 1937

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Dear Diary,

What a difficult few weeks it's been. Why's it been so hard? Well... I've been itching to, I mean... Every time I see him I, ugh.

I haven't been able to restrain myself. Every time I look at him I melt and it's impossible to do anything.

Having to deal with all of this and these feelings and... I don't know, it's just been really hard... literally.

—————

We were in my room and it was the first time we were together in what had felt like forever.

The problem was this depression that was in full swing. Bucky had gotten a job a few months ago to support the both of us even though he didn't have to. Now, I don't get to see him every day.

Today though, we finally had the whole thing to ourselves, no work until Thursday.

We were sitting on my bed not really talking, just sort of staring off into space and thinking.

I felt his hand find it's way to the inside of my thigh. I looked over at him and he was already looking at me.

"I promised," he said, making me smile. Then his lips were on mine... that feeling was so familiar but it had been forever.

My hand met his jaw, I could feel it moving beneath my fingers. I felt him on my neck, playing with my collar.

"Fuck..." I whispered into his lips, feeling his hand grip me through my pants. Butterflies fluttered in my stomach and my face seemed to go red as my blood boiled.

I felt my breathing quicken as his tongue entered my mouth, his hand gripping me tighter through my pants.

"Steven Grant Rogers," he looked down, "you're already more than halfway there," he chuckled. I felt myself blush even more than I already was, if that's even possible.

He gently touched my zipper repeatedly and the pressure that was building up was barely bearable.

I broke our kiss and swung my leg over and straddled him, my hands meeting to top of his buttoned shirt. He pulled down at my neck and licked my lips slowly before kissing me again.

I tried undoing his shirt but they wouldn't come undone, probably because I couldn't actually see what it was I was doing. I pulled down on the sides of his lapel and buttons flew out in all directions.

He looked up at me and his smile slowly melted away when he took one look at my lustful face.

He undid my belt and threw it to the side, beginning to undo my button and zipper as well. I felt some pressure release as my underwear bulged out of my pants. He looked up into my eyes then down at it and, eventually, slowly pulled my underwear down.

He let out a harsh breath and let his finger trail up the bottom of my erection, watching me quiver at his touch.

When he stopped, I opened my eyes and watched him look at me. "This ain't fair, Buck," I whispered.

"Wh-" he stuttered as I brought my hands down to his pants and undid them.

Before either of us knew what was happening it was me and him sitting there completely naked... not that either of us was complaining.

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