Lovebug

It wasn't

I wish I could tell you what was said, what we talked about.
But I was too stuck in my bubble of dissociation to remember.
The smoking, the drinking, combined together made me into a confused shell looking for her humanity.
I've never had more fun in my life.

Every minute felt like a day.
Every word that was spoken sounded like it was louder than a jet engine.
The walls moved.

Now, the three of us are burnt out on the couch.
'The Sound Of Music' ended god knows when.
Now we listen to the Jazz radio station because Ruth thought it would be funny.

It wasn't.

The rest of the afternoon dragged on numbly.
I spent most of it inside my own head.

Thinking about sleepy.

Sleepy is remarkably quiet.
Something about him tells me there is a lot going on in his head.
He behaves like he's one of Ruth's toys.
Submissive.
He does whatever she says.
But doesn't everyone?

We all sit quietly while she rants her manic rants.
God, Ruth puts on quite the show.
Maybe the reason we let her do whatever she wants is because she's such a spectacle, we don't want to miss what's next.

I understand why Sleepy has stuck around.
I just want to walk around in his mind.