the hurt ⇀ jadon sancho

09, the first kiss

the first kiss after the break up never happened. i met the guy from the date again and got to know him a bit better, but he was still very distant when it came to personal information. we were on a date and stood under a street light in a park, as he leaned down and closed his eyes slowly. i stopped him from doing it and he was very confused about it. "i can't do this. i'm sorry, but i think we should stop seeing each other. i don't have any feelings for you" was what i said before i turned around and left.

we walked out of the cinema and stood by the street light. "can i show you a place?" he asked and i leaned my head to the left side. "like, right now?" i asked back and he nodded. "well, when you don't plan to kill me, then yes i guess" i answered and he laughed. "nah, i'm not trying to murder you" he said and still chuckled. "i already see the big headline in the newspaper. 'young football star murdered a young girl'. a bestseller" i said and he laughed even harder. we got into his car and listened to the quiet music coming out of the radio. after about 20 minutes he stopped the car and we got out. "close your eyes" he sad and put both of his hands on my shoulders. "if you changed your mind and suddenly want to kill me, please don't" i said and smiled. "no no. just trust me" he said and i whispered an simple "okay" into the cold evening air. we walked a bit and the he put one arm on my shoulder and stood beside me. "open your eyes" he said and i did. we could look over whole dortmund, which was lit up by all the lights. "this is so beautiful, thank you so much" i said with tears in my eyes and turned to him. his face was illuminated by the lights of the city and looks beautiful. we leaned forward each other and closed our eyes shortly before our lips touched. his soft lips met mine and here we were, standing in front of dortmund's skyline, kissing and falling even more in love.

i never heard from him again. when i told scarlett about it, she was happy that i was honest with myself and didn't force fake feelings onto me. it were months since the break up but my situation still wasn't any better. it slightly got better, but not much. "do you think he is over me?" i asked my best friend and she turned to me, a suprising look on her face. "i don't know lilia. you could ask marco if he knows anything." she said and i nodded. "scarlett, i think i know why i can't get over him."