another weasley (discontinued)

chapter 17

i felt bad for running away from Harry, but i hate to talk about my dreams. i always have this one recurring one that i never tell anyone about, not even Ron. i can't talk about it. i know it's just a dream, but it always felt so real.

***

Hermione left the hospital a few weeks later, furless, tailess, and whiskerless.

she, Harry, and Ron had been spending a lot of time together lately without me. i'll walk in the room and all talking will stop. i don't know what they're talking about, but it had something to do with me.

i found out what it was the week after.

Harry and i had just walked into the common room after particularly awful quidditch practice, and Ron and Hermione were waiting for us.

"Riley. we need to talk to you." Ron said hesitantly.

Harry left my side to stand next to them. they all were staring at me.

"why are you staring at me? what do you want to talk about?" i was very confused.

"you look like a zombie, you can't do first year magic, and you play quidditch like a troll with no arms." Ron blurted.

i took a step back i was so shocked.

"e--excuse me?" i said.

"Ronald!" Hermione slapped his arm. "what he means to say, is that you look like you haven't slept in a month and something is really eating at you. you can tell us what's wrong, Riley. we'll listen."

i took a shaky breath. i should have know this would happen eventually.

"sit down, Riles." Ron said gently.

i sat down.

"just tell us what's wrong. we can help you." Harry said.

i shook my head. "you can't help me and i can't tell you what's wrong because you wouldn't understand. i don't understand why i've been doing it, but somehow i have. i just black out and then i wake up somewhere else and there is blood on my hands and writing on the wall and petrified kids and i don't know what to do because i don't know how i've been doing it." i blurted everything out all at once.

Ron had to take a step back. Hermione looked like she might throw up, but Harry looked like he already knew.

"s--so you've been attacking the muggleborns?" Hermione asked.

i burst into tears and collapsed on the ground. "i--i knew you wouldn't u--understand. i d--don't know h--how i was doing it, b--but i don't w--want to do it." i buried my face in my hands.

i felt someones arms wrap around me. it was Harry. "hey, it's okay. Riley, i know you wouldn't do something like this."

"Riles, do you have any idea how this has been happening?" Ron asked, taking a seat next to us on the floor.

i did have an idea, but i couldn't tell them. they would think i was crazy. "i--i don't know." i said, wiping my eyes.

Hermione came to sit next to Ron. "well, we'll figure it out. we'll help you get through this." she hugged me, and i hugged her back.

"i love you guys." i said trying to smile.

***

every time Harry was alone and i walked in on him, he was always writing in a little leather book. it looked like my diary, but that was gone now...

or was it. i didn't flush it down the toilet or anything. he could have easily walked into the girls bathroom and taken it. i'll have to ask him about it.

"Harry." i whispered to him as we did homework in study hall. "what's that black book you keep writing in?" i ask.

he looks nervous, but shakes his head. "i'll show you later, it's in my room."

"can you at least tell me what it is?" i ask quietly.

he sighed but agreed. i slide my finished potions essay into my bag, and lean forward to listen better. "it's a diary. i found it in the Murlte's bathroom. someone tried to throw it away... are you alright?" he stopped in the middle of his sentence.

my eyes were wide and i was starting to panic. i didn't reply, but i stood up and turned in my essay before running out the door and up to Gryffindor tower.

i'll have to be fast, he's not allowed to leave until he's finished, but we have quidditch practice this afternoon so he'll get out early. sprinting up the stairs, i silently pray to Merlin that there is no one in his dorm room.

i do a silent cheer when i find it empty, and then i begin my search. i have to find the diary before Tom starts to control Harry too.

i started by trying to keep it neat, but it wasn't going to work out that way. digging through trunks and closets and looking under Harry's bed took an hour at the least. i decided to check Ron's stuff too. by the time i had realized that i hadn't check the most obvious place, Neville came into the room.

i ducked under Harry's bed and lay facing the underside of the mattress waiting for Neville to leave, when i noticed it. there was the corner of the diary sticking out in between the wooded base of the bed. i curse myself for being so stupid. the first place i looked should have been under that mattress.

when i heard his footsteps leave, and the door close, i crawled out from under the bed, flipped the mattress, grabbed the diary, and the world went black.