Downfall | ✔️

Chapter 8.

"Why did you leave me that note? Why didn't you just text me?" I ask.

"Amara, I didn't have your number. And I couldn't exactly ask Jacob." he chuckles.

"Oh, yeah." Why didn't I think of that?

Mason slides his phone back into his pocket and looks at me. As his eyes meet mine I feel my breathing change. The moonlight is shining down on his face and his eyes are practically glowing. I've never appreciated brown eyes before. I always thought they were bland and dull. Until Mason's. I feel like I could stare into them all night. His beautiful, cinnamon eyes. They reminded me of freshly turned earth after rain, these mysterious golden rays circling an eclipse. His perfectly placed brown curls, that fell slightly and carelessly against his forehead. The way his mouth turned up slightly when I looked into his eyes. And the way he bit his lip when he seen me in my dress. I dont know if it was the alcohol, and the weed, or if it was just the perfectly lit moment on the wall outside of a frat party. Without thinking I grab his button up shirt and crash my lips down on his.

I feel him tense at first, before melting into the kiss. His lips are soft and inviting, and the feeling of him kissing me back, pulling me closer to his chest is a better high than any substance could ever give me. My hands move to his hair as I feel the curls slip through my fingers. He tastes of mint and strawberries. He must be wearing chapstick, damn am I going to bully him for that later. I pull away gently and my eyes lock with Masons again. This time his eyes are different. As beautfiful as ever, but more vulnerable, and even.. scared. I watch his smile fall to an intense frown as he looks at me.

"Mason?" I ask him, my voice is low and nervous.

I watch his eyes change once more, this time back to the hard, dark brown pebbles I once saw. He looks as cold and shut off as the day I met him, and I feel my heart sink.

"Why did you do that?" he looks emotionless, completely emotionless.

"I don't know, you kissed me back." my voice sounds pathetic and desperate.

"Well I shouldn't have. And you should go." he says, standing up from the wall and dusting himself off.

I don't know what to say, I'm speechless. I felt myself sober up almost instantly. What have I done? What am I doing?

"Mason-"

"No. You need to leave." he snaps, before turning away.

I take deep breaths and close my eyes to stop the tears forming from escaping.

"Here's your jacket." I say, removing his leather jacket from my shoulders as my voice cracks. I refuse to cry in front of him again, I'm humiliated enough. He seems to reach out to take it before snapping his hand back.

"I don't care, keep it, or don't." he says through his teeth before storming off to his car and driving away.

I stand there. Outside the house of a party I didn't want to come to. Frighteningly sober and alone. I feel the tears fall down my face and I make no effort to stop them. I ruined our friendship. I must've read it wrong, completely wrong. What was I thinking? I mentally scold myself. But he kissed me back.. I seen the way he looked at me, the way his lips moved with mine. I've never kissed somebody first in my life. I don't know what came over me. Do I have feelings for Mason? My heart hurts at the thought. He doesn't care. He left me stranded at a party with no means to get home. He doesn't care. He never did. The realisation hits me like a ton of bricks.

Mason's POV:

I grip the steering wheel, clenching my fists. I shouldn't have let it get that far. I can't believe she fucking kissed me, and I left her there. How is she going to get back? Fuck. This is all my fault. All those years of keeping myself to myself and I let it be undone in one week by the brunette with the sad eyes. I slam my fist against the wheel.

"Fuck." I yell to myself.

I should've never been her friend. I don't have friends. Not friends that I let close to me. Friends that I party with and get high with, yeah. But not anybody I care about. What's so different about her anyway? Nothing, that's what. I can stop caring. I'm lying to myself and I know I am. How can I care about somebody so much, so quickly?

I feel like I depend on her—I barely know her, she barely knows me. That's how it needs to stay. Maybe it's time to move again.

Amara's POV:

I shove through the crowded rooms trying to find Jess, I can't find her anywhere. I shouldn't have to make her leave here for me anyway. I need to call a cab but I don't even know the address. I turn around to see Daisy and Holly walking towards me, great. I quickly try to wipe my tear stained cheeks.

"Are you okay, girl?" Holly asks, she gives me a sympathetic smile whilst Daisy just stares at me.

"I'm fine, do you know the address so I can call a cab?" my voice is still shaky and I hope she doesn't question me on it.

"Sure, I'll call you one." she smiles and leaves to find a quiet spot to make the call, leaving me standing with Daisy.

"What did he do?" she asks.

"What?" I reply, pretending to not know who she's talking about.

"Mason, what did he do now?" she asks, she seems unsurprised and just.. used to it. I wonder if I'm not the only girl he's left here crying.

"Nothing." I lie.

She rolls her eyes. "Liar, but just know he probably wont call you." she shrugs before walking away—short and sweet, huh. He doesn't even have my number to call me.

I walk back outside to the wall I had sat on with Mason to wait on the cab, my eyes sting and I grudge using Mason's jacket to keep myself warm. But I'm freezing. The cab arrives and the drive to my house is quiet. I pay the driver and walk inside, sitting on the couch with my head in my hands. I can't help but feel alone. My mom isn't here, Jess is with her boyfriend, and my only other.. friend is, well, no longer my friend. I ruined it. My chest feels heavy and I'm too exhausted to cry again. I cant believe that Mason just left me there, after kissing me back. After pulling me closer to him. After how far our friendship had come in such a short time. Maybe Jake was right. It was a bad idea in the first place.

Why do I always let myself trust the wrong people? I spent so long ensuring I have my guards up, and let people in slowly. For Mason to come along, mysterious and charming, so unbelievably intriguing, even when he was just an asshole with a guitar - sitting in his dorm room angering me with his stupid insults.
I felt like I needed to know him. I was wrong. I was foolish to show how vulnerable I am, by kissing him. Our friendship brought me so much joy, and I ruined it. He ruined it. I guess we both ruined it.

(a/n: I'm currently editing these chapters! Hang in there—and thank you for all the lovely comments!)