Coco (ATLA) (Book 1)- Major Editing Coming SOON

Book 3: Fire (The Awakening)

word count: 1,686

Book 3: Fire

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It seems crazy that almost a year ago I began traveling with a man who became my everything. He was my protector, he was like a father to me, he had my back. I finally knew what it felt like to be around people again, to feel loved. He gave me my first real bed in years. He made that cold ship a home, and then, it was all taken away from me.

For the past few weeks, the gaang and I have been sailing the seas disguised as a Fire Nation fleet. I don't really like looking like Fire Nation, it makes me feel icky, but this is what we have to do. We've been able to pick up a few friends on the way, like Hakoda; Sokka and Katara's father, the warriors of the watertribe, and others; like Pipsqueek and The Duke, I like them. I was hoping we'd find my brother, and possibly my father, but of course we didn't. They're probably in Ba Sing Se still being held against their will. I feel sick to my stomach just thinking about it. I constantly wonder if I made the right decision of going with Sokka and Katara that night, or should I have stayed with my brother and father. 

This is tough. I feel like nothing in my life is working out and I just don't know what to do. I'm a kid, I shouldn't have to make decisions like this, none of us should. We shouldn't have the responsibilities of ending a war. When I was with uncle, life just seemed right. It was an odd situation, but I liked that I had someone to depend on, that uncle took me under his wing and allowed me to be a kid- or as much of a kid as you could be in a war. I got to do homeschooling, I got to date, we had game nights, we had fun! I mean, no one really thought Zuko would ever capture the Avatar. And now I'm right back where I started, only this time, I have my friends with me. It's not fair to them- to anybody!

Nightfall hit, and I'm sitting outside on the deck. I look up at the stars and the moon as a warm breeze gently blows through my hair. Uncle's pin is the only thing keeping it from hitting my face. My hair is now past my ears, and barely touches my shoulder. My face has healed up nicely, but sadly, my scar hasn't gone anywhere. I guess my mother can finally recognize me now that my hair is growing back. I should be happy, I should be excited, but I'm not. I'm miserable. Ba Sing Se has fallen, Zuko, Azula, and Ozai are back on the throne together, and they managed to take uncle down. There is nowhere to run. The Fire Nation have practically won, and I'm terrified.

This is the only time I have to myself. I love being with the gaang, especially Sokka, but sometimes I get overwhelmed, and need to be alone. I use this time to think and reflect about everything thats happened. I just feel like everything is against me. I constantly question my place here because I feel guilty. I'm the one who trusted Zuko and convinced everyone else he was worth saving, but look what happened. Aang is still unconscious, and it's all my fault. We don't know if he'll ever wake up. I should know what to do to keep our culture alive, to make sure the airbenders are never forgotten, but I don't! And if I were to be free to be who I am as an airbender, that would put everyone in danger!

"Hey, I -"

I turn around to see Sokka with a concerned look on his face.

"Are you ok?" He asks.

"Oh."

I quickly wipe the tears off of my cheeks.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I lie.

He sighs and takes a seat next to me.

"No you're not."

"...You're right," I admit having no energy to deny anything.