Elastic Heart

-chapter seventy seven-

It started on page 26. 

Of course, leave it to Jolene to number each page of her notebook. There were currently 84 pages. 

But it all began where the shaky writing starts. 

26.

I had another dream. The kind where I fall asleep and I see through the eyes of Nico. I'm is holding Seamus, the infant, while I watch the others coax their prey down an alleyway. 

Mirabelle is the one that lures them. Nothing like an inhumanly beautiful woman to lead unsuspecting drunk men down a dark alleyway with the promise of something better. 

They each drink their fill. The one human man is split between two of them. 

'We don't want to leave bodies' I say. Mirabelle then lures one in for me to have for myself. 

I don't know if it was something that Coven leaders do, drink the biggest fill last or what but I'm suddenly leaning forward and the scent of alcohol is overpowering. I open my mouth and my teeth tear through flesh and muscle and blood fills my mouth. 

I expect to spit out the familiar metallic taste that I've come to associate with blood but to my surprise, it's warm and sweet. It tastes...

good. 

I don't know if that thought startled me but I'm suddenly awake and Rosalie is trying to comfort me from a supposed nightmare. I want to tell her about what I just saw but I stop myself. Maybe I'm afraid that she'll be disgusted in me. Maybe it's because she's already running herself ragged trying to prepare for Nico. But it's nothing new and nothing that they need to know so I keep my mouth shut. 

32. 

I had another dream where I was Nico. I'm holding this piece of old fabric to my face and I'm taking deep inhales. The scent is so wonderful. It's like mint and ice and pine but with something floral and vanilla. The fabric is faded pink, torn from a dress. There is a rip in the fabric and my fingers gently caress the hole. 

The fabric isn't mine in real life. I don't wear pink or dresses. 

For some reason, I have a feeling that this fabric belongs to 'my darling'. Something in my mind tells me that the person who this fabric belongs to is missing. 

I then reach into the inner pocket of my jacket and I pull out a very faded and weathered photograph. It has a yellowing tint to it but there is a woman. It looks likes she's wearing the dress that the fabric belongs to. My chest hurts. It shouldn't. My heart doesn't beat,  I don't need to breathe but looking at this woman makes my chest hurt. 

And then I'm suddenly looking into my face in the photograph and I wake up. 

Rosalie was out hunting so Jasper is the one to calm my panic. He seems to know that it was different than my usual nightmare but he comforts me nonetheless. 

43.

This dream was different. It wasn't during the present but rather a memory from Nico. 

I'm in a large mansion with soft music playing as people dance around me. I'm holding a woman to me as we dance. I can't see her face. I can't remember what she looks like. 

She smells like mint, ice, and pine. 

I twirl her around on the floor before we stop as I dip her. Her pink dress flows around her and we laugh.