How To Be The Best Third Wheel

Original Edition - Tip 45: Communicate Your Thoughts

"How?" James asks, prodding the bear to demonstrate her attack.

"We should do something fun. I know! Let's go skating in the afternoon!" she suggests excitedly.

"I don't know-" I start, but James interrupts me.

"That's a great idea! Sounds fun, right Lara?"

"Super." I agree unenthusiastically. It's obvious that nobody actually cares about my opinion, so I keep the fact that I don't even know how to skate, to myself.

They continue to exchange ideas, while I sit there like I'm invisible, mindlessly staring at the television. I look back and forth at them. I scoff at the sight and try to focus on my T.V. show but the little green-eyed monster within me leaves me restless. Abruptly, I turn off the T.V. and leave the room to let myself give off steam.

I head into the kitchen and sit down at the table by myself. Perfect, I think, I'm the third wheel in my own relationship, and in my own house. I'm starting to think that being left out is really part of my destiny...

James leaves the house at about 7 o'clock and I see him off at the door. The snow outside is falling softly, contrast to our particularly wild array of blizzards within the week. Through the door opening, I see the glimmer of the street lights, lighting up the dark evening.

"Goodnight De la Cruz." James says.

"Goodnight." I reply, and he turns around, with me slowly shutting the door.

"Wait-" he starts, turning back to face me.

"Yeah?"

"I know you've been real busy lately and the real reason I came over was to spend a little more time with you. You've been cramming like crazy and I always have practice after school. I feel like I only get to see you during the mornings or when you're not studying during lunch."

"It's okay. We went to the mall the other day...we just didn't really spend a lot of time together." I reply, trying to mask some of the disappointment in my voice with a half-smile.

"Yeah, I was with Eliza." he recounts.

"Yeah."

"Are you-" he starts but I interrupt him.

"Don't worry about me. I trust you and I know you would never do anything intentionally to hurt me."

"I'd never want to hurt you again."

I believe him, I really do. But everyone never wants to hurt others, it jusy happens.

"Okay. Goodnight James." I repeat, attempting to close the door another time but he pushes it back open.

"I forgot something."

"What is it? I'll get it for you."

"I meant I forgot to do something." With Eliza upstairs and the two of us alone at the door, he grabs my waist with both of his hands and pulls me towards him. Sweeping strands of my hair from my face, he leans over and places his lips on mine.

His kiss doesn't falter, even for a second.

And for a few moments, we are alone again, and things feel like the way they should be. I kiss him back, unwilling to let go of him just yet, not ready to step back into reality. I know that when this is over, I might break down again.

When I finally break the kiss, he keeps me close. With his arms wrapped around me, I find myself breathless against his chest. And so we stand, both of us silent, breathless as though the air has suddenly got thin. The only sound I hear is the rhythmic beating of his heart.