His tears

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He continued drinking while laughing and crying at the same time.. in short he looks like crazy... but i guess i'm crazier than him.

" Are you laughing because you are happy or you are laughing because you want to release the pain that you are experiencing right now" i suddenly asked him

He stopped laughing and starred at me.

" i'm happy.. you know why? Because you are here.. because we are together, i'm happy because even though i lost my wealth and all you are still here on my side" he said and gulped the beer that he was holding

" okay" i said and stood up, i'm ready to walk when he pulled my hands and hugged me from the back

" Hey..get off .. me.." i said as i move my body to avoid him

" please give me 5 minutes, let's stay like this for 5 minutes" he said and bowed his head on my nape

I keep still, my heart beats very fast right now, i don't know if he can feel it or what.

We were on that position when i felt a water flowing down from my nape.

Is he crying?

I faced him and held his face

" hey.. why are you crying?" I asked as i lift his chin up to face me

He smiled in response " tears of joy" he said while sniffing

" i don't know our real status back then, i don't know how long we stayed together, the things happened to us and i don't know the word US, but right now i assure you that i will be on your side" i said as i wiped the tears on his eyes

" am i being selfish right now?" He suddenly asked

" why?"

"Because i rebel against my fathers will?, because i chose my happiness more than them?"

I don't know how to answer his question right now, i don't know what to do.

I hugged him tight, a hugged that simply says that i will always be with you.

" money is nothing you can easily earn that" i said "right now the hardest part is not loosing everything you have it is loosing your parents on your side, loosing the people who helped and mold you" i added

He sat and opened the beer and gulped it, i  tried stopping him but i can't he can easily block me using his big hands.

I stopped and sat in front of him

" Off, always remember that God didn't promise days without pain, laughter without sorrow, sun without rain, but he promise strength for the day, comfort for the tears and light for the way, the pain you are experiencing right now are just challenges that you need to fight for, challenges that will teach you to be stronger than before, no one will help you survive through it except yourself"

I don't know what i'm saying right now, all i just want is to uplift his mood and lessen the pain he feels right now.

" cry as hard as you want, but just make sure that when you stop crying, you'll never cry again for the same resason." I added

" how can i ever do that? Right now i lost my parents because i fight them back, i lost my wealth and i lost you?" He said and starred at me with his swollen eyes

" what do you mean you lost me?, i'm still here sitting in front of you" i answered and smiled

" i lost you.... i lost the old you..because of me the old you leave me.. you can't remember everything because of me"he continued talking

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