Dreamland

sometime around midnight

I just want to be left alone

Left alone with my never ending thoughts
The never ending cycle of pain I experience once in a great while

One day I'll finally be able to feel the light touch my cold skin
To feel it seep into my bones and breathe the life back into me again

One day...

One day I'll appreciate the small things I didn't know mattered
Sometimes I do...

Sometimes I recognize the small things in life and I try to grasp onto it
But there's a part of me that just doesn't care

I want to care
I want to care for you
I want to care for myself

But it's hard when my head isn't in reality
My thoughts are scattered in a place where I cannot reach

But do I want to reach it?

Because if I do I'll be afriad to feel the things that I so desperately hate and love

I want to feel for you
But I can't bring it in me to care...

It's weird to think of things like this at a time where I'm supposed to be sleeping

But my dreams is what keeps me awake at night
And what haunt me in the morning

I want to be good
I want to be good for you
I want to be good for myself

But honestly

I really just don't care...