The Unexpected

34

"I was scared alright? It happened so quick that I broke up with you but I know that was a mistake. It's something I can't take back. I've said this several times but being friends is the better choice."

"I really like you leah.." I said softly. You can hear the sadness in my voice even more. She doesn't answer. I bring a finger in between the corner of my eye and wiped it a bit.

"It's my fault that I hid the fact that I have a kid from you...but.. I was scared to lose someone I was falling so hard for. I was so happy with you and I didn't wanna mess it up. But clearly I did and now I'm more messed up than I expected."

"It's not your fault"

"It is. Would you have wanted to be with me if I told you the first date night we had?" I asked her and she doesn't answer again. "Exactly. At least I had my chances with you. I feel lucky to have been where I've been with you but I wish I could do more.."

"I'm sorry.." she says.

I roll my eyes and look away.

"Where are you? It's dark"

"I don't know.." I said without emotion.

"You don't know??"

"At some parking garage by the beach. I'm about to eat" I mutter.

"Alone?"

"Yeah I mean do you see anyone else in the fucking car?" I ask with some attitude. "Okay" She says.

"I don't know where to eat. Veronica's at my moms."

"Well..would you like me to come join you?"

"You're inviting yourself?" I asked.

"Yup"

I shake my head. "fine" I sighed. Of course I can't say no. I wanna see her. "Send me your location. I'll be there soon"

"K" I said. Then hung up right away. Why do I do this to myself? I torture myself and inside I get the hopes that something amazing would happen but nothing can change. She's just trying to help me feel better and make things right.

Later Leah met me at this restaurant. She sat down across the two seated table from me. We're sitting by the window where we can see the beach from here but there's a street in between and a bunch of people just touring and walking around. It's beautiful.

"What would you do if a seal lion just randomly popped out of that water while you're there laying in the sand. Would you go play with it or run away?" She randomly asks me. I kind of chuckled and gave her a weird look. "I mean aren't they gentle? I'd probably go check it out" I said.

"Yeah? I'd probably run"

"Why?" I ask.

She shrugs and looks at the view again. "They're cute from a distance. Once they get close to to you I bet you they'd go all up in your face. Their nasty wet whiskers would touch you and maybe they'd lick you"

"Okay it's not a cat! They're not gonna try and lick me" I giggle.

"Whatever you say"

"Besides..sea lions won't come on the shore unless you're at Laguna beach. Remember when me and you went to the beach? Twice? No sea lions." I said.

"Right. You're right. It was just a random thought hun" she says.

I roll my eyes and look the opposite way to try and find our server.

"So our daughter at your moms place?" She asks. I look at her right away.

"My daughter? Yes she's at my moms now" I laugh. "You know I'm kidding. I still like messing with you"