Doomed For Heartbreak?

Chapter Nineteen: Kate's POV

Chapter Nineteen: Kate's POV

Before walking up the stairs, I looked back at Kyle and Kristy, asking them with my eyes to follow me. They understood and jumped off the counter, trailing behind me. Once we reached my room, I went straight for my cell on my nightstand. I picked it up, looking anxiously at the two people in the room with me. They gave me reassuring smiles and sat on either side of me.

I breathed in slowly, trying to calm myself down before dialing his number. Once it started to ring I panicked, knowing there was no turning back now. "Hello?" the voice on the other line said excitedly.

"Hi," I responded, pretending I was completely at ease. "We kinda need to talk." I said, attempting to plan out in my head what I was going to say.

"Oh," he said back, the excitement in his voice gone.

"Jack, I don't know if what you've told me about Natalie is true or not," her name roughly slipped out of my mouth, sounding harsh. "Regardless, I can't have anything like that happen again."

"Ok, I'll make sure it doesn't babe, I promise I will never hurt you again." He pleaded, not getting the point. I painfully sighed and dreaded what I was going to have to say.

"That's not it... I can't do this anymore... I just..." I couldn't even finish, but he seemed to get it this time.

"What are you saying?" he asked hesitantly, as if he didn't want to know but needed to.

"I think we need to break up," I said quickly with my eyes squeezed shut in tension.

"No!" the word was full of pain and venom. "Kate, don't do this! I know you've been hurt a lot in the past and some of that hurt came from me, which I will never forgive myself for; believe me. You can't run right when we get close; you have to trust that I won't leave you! I'll always be here!" his voice sounded weak and strained, yet strong and forceful. I knew he was telling the truth, and I knew he was right; I was running right when we got super close.

I considered what he was saying, and I sort of wanted to say 'I'm sorry' and 'we can work it out'. But I couldn't. As much as my heart wanted to say the words, my head knew it wasn't right. I had to listen to my head, for the millionth time in my life. It was my only way to defend against getting hurt again in the future.

And so, I had to stay strong in my previous decision. I had to let him go. I held back the persistent tears forming in my eyes before whispering, "Jack, I can't, I'm sorry. I will always love you, but I can't do this. Goodbye." I pulled the phone away from my ear, pressed end, and broke down crying in Kyle's arms.

I knew what I'd done was out of selfishness. I broke up with him to protect myself, to save myself from future heartbreak. I had to get out before I became any more attached to him.

Just as my tears were subsiding, it all sunk in for the first time. I mean really sunk in. I wasn't Jack's anymore and he wasn't mine. We wouldn't go on any more dates or spend anymore quality time together. He would no longer call me babe or hold me in his arms.

Although he'd made mistakes, I was the one who broke up with him. Although he hadn't been the perfect boyfriend the past month, I was the one who actually ended it. Although I already wanted him back, I knew I was to blame.