Whatever oneshots •Boyf riends•

Wingman! [Fluff]

Life's been really, really, really fucking nice to me. No, joke! Not at all a sarcastic comment.

So sorry for the slow update, just my mental healths been all over the place and well, abuse has been happening to me. Bruises have slowed me down, and I apologise.
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~Brooke's pov~

Michael Mell is a very gay man. We all know that, right?

I mean, the rainbow patch thing on his hoodie screams it all. At first I thought it was like, a pride patch to like, support lgbt people and stuff. But it's really easy to tell that Michael is this generations gayest gay to ever gay.

Wow,  that's fun to say! Gayest gay to ever gay... I should like, quote that from now on, or something.

God help me I can hear her voice

So when I get a call from Mr. Mell— Yeah no, I'm never calling Michael that ever again, sounds like a teacher, or something, Michael having a gay panic attack, I know exactly who this gay is gay for.

'So, you like Jeremy?'

'Yup.'

I knew it!

I mean, whenever he looks at his bestfriend of 12 years, he practically screams 'I love you!' Everyone knows it, it's quite scary. I mean-- like, not everyone knowing Michaels crush on Jeremy is scary, it's scary that Rich knows Michael has a crush on him. Like, the guy probably writes fanfiction on them! Isn't that like, I don't know... creepy? Stalkerish? Can never tell... like, Rich is my friend of course, but sometimes he can scare me with his behaviour... still love him though!

As in like, friend of course. I don't want an angry Jake Dillinger at my door protesting a uno match to decide who loves Rich more. Besides Jake would win! Because he loves his boyfriend with all his heart, and... he's a beast at uno!

I get pulled back into reality when Michael asks
'Wait, did you tell Jenna?'

'Nope!' I smile, holding my phone and adjusting a photo of me and Jenna side hugging and smiling. Jenna's my short, cute girlfriend. Wait, did you want that information? Sorry... um, focus Brooke! 'Don't worry, Michael. Your secrets safe with me.'

'Glad to know, I don't want your girlfriend all the way up Jeremy's ass about my stupid little crush.'

Probably should mention now that I'm a massive multishipper, and one of my many ships is Brooke and Jenna. Don't hate, just me expanding my horizons and appreciating other ships in Be More Chill.

'So, Michael. Are you gonna ask him out?'

'No.' Michael responds rather quickly, he pauses, and then adds. 'And even if I were too, I don't know how to.'

I smile, 'I can help you.'

'Why?' Michael asks on the other line.

I shrug, but then remember Michael can't see me and quickly say 'Just cause. I want to be your wingman!' I say determinately.

'Sure, Brooke.' I hear Michael chuckle, 'I'll make you a bridesmaid if this works... maybe the maid of honour, if you're lucky.' I grin, excited. I protest, 'Yes!' Which earns another chuckle from Michael, I can practically hear his smile.

~Michaels pov~

Brooke brings a smile to my face, she being only thing not making my temples pop in frustration. See, I'm playing Pokémon on my Gameboy colour, and I'm fighting Misty. The little bitch is spamming her moves, not to be mean to the gal. But honestly, she's not doing my team a favour here. At all.

'So--,'Brooke shuffled on the other line of the phone and I guess she's laying down on her bed, can never be sure, it's a short conspiracy theory. 'If you and Jerry were on a date,' she's not allowed to call Jeremy Jere-bear anymore, that's my job. 'What would you want to do?'

Before I can respond, Misty—The rude ass, narcissistic bitch—uses a move that takes away all the precious health of my Butterfree. My mind mentally screams, as the dreaded line pops up on the screen.

Michael has no Pokémon available! Michael is now unable to battle, Michael blacked out!

'FUCK!'

~Brooke's pov~

'FUCK!' Michael screamed on the other line, catching me off guard.

Did he just say he wanted to like, fuck with Jeremy on the first date! THE FIRST DATE?

Wow, I didn't know this side of Michael.

I turn my body and lay on my stomach, resting my hand on my cheek. 'Wow Michael.' I raise an awkward brow, chuckling. 'I didn't know you were that kind of guy.' I smile, 'Make sure to use some lube.'

Michael was silent until I heard a quick shifting noise that can only be described as Michael sitting up straight at the speed of light, oh er... sitting up gay? Hey! That... that actually sounds pretty funny! Hehaha.

'Wait no, that's not what I--' Michael cleared his throat, collecting himself I suppose. 'I don't mean, I mean, that's not what I meant.' He gulped. I couldn't help but laugh at this.

Michael heard my laugh, stuttering 'I-I don't... I-I don't want to fuck-k Jeremy!'

Hearing Michael stutter is rare, seeing as Jeremy's usually stuttering every word that comes out of his mouth. Poor boy.

Michael cleared his throat, 'Okay, maybe I do want to fuck Jeremy-' Michaels voice cracked, wow that's new.

'B-But...' Michael cleared his throat, trying to relax. 'But that's not what I want to do on the first date! I want an actual, actual date! Just the two of us,' I heard him flop back into the embrace of his bed. 'having fun...'

I smile softly.

How cute.