Desired

29. Honey and Oreos

'Oreo's!' Roman grabs the packet of biscuits in front of me and rips them open. 'I loved these as a kid.'

'Shut up! I'm trying to sleep,' Cas groans from the mattress.

I chuckle and pop an oreo in my mouth. Rusted machinery sits among the long grass in the fields surrounding us. The grass also hides large animal carcasses; only the tops of them can be seen.

'Do you know if any animals survived?' I ask.

'Klein found a dog once, it was a beautiful black white fluffy dog. It was always running around like crazy. Klein always hoped he'd find another dog to breed him with but he never did. That's the problem, survivors have to meet other survivors and reproduce for their species to continue. Think how many animals would have survived if they simply found others to mate with and reproduce.' Roman grabs another oreo and bites it.

'Is that a line Klein would use?' I retort.

'Yes, but it's still true.'

I open the jar of crystallised honey, dig a spoon in then pop it into my mouth. The sticky sweetness slowly slides down my throat.

Honey tastes amazing.

'You sure that's ok to eat?' Roman frowns.

'Should be. Honey doesn't seem to go off and the sugar is good for an energy boost.' I shrug. 'It's the tins you have to be careful of. Me and Zach were sick a few times because of spoiled tinned food.'

Roman takes a spoon and digs it into the honey. 'Must have been hard just the two of you.'

'We always found clean clothes and food. Most of the time we even found a decent place to sleep.' I grab another oreo and stuff the entire thing in my mouth.

'Still, you probably had loads of arguments.'

'No,' I mumble with a mouth full of Oreo.

We didn't. It always felt so easy and normal when it was the two of us. He helped ease the loss I felt for my family, he made the days pass quickly. Was it all an act? He said it was, however, it doesn't make sense. If he planned on convincing me that we should return to his settlement, wouldn't he have made things more difficult? He would have done things to make me think we couldn't survive.

'How long were you travelling with Haiden before you met others?' I ask.

'A year or so. We lived like this, sleeping in people's houses, eating the food they never got round to eating. It wasn't as old back then.'

I take another spoonful of honey. 'That must have been hard, looking after a baby by yourself.'

'It was. One-year-olds are demanding and they have to be carried everywhere.' Roman takes another spoonful of honey. 'I was glad when we finally found others and somewhere to settle.'

'Ethel told me Doll found it. Was there a special reason she chose that place?'

'It's within one of Klein's ten-mile zones which he refuses to go in. Except, Doll found out the nuclear station had been decommissioned. Klein's map was old so he still thought it was active. I'm surprised Klein came to us the other day. Usually, he gets his trackers to come and if he ever wants to talk to Ethel he'll do it via radio.'

'Have many people left Klein's to join you?'

'A few. Doll tried to convince the women who she knew Klein and his friends abused but none of them wanted to leave.'

'Why wouldn't they leave and join somewhere they're safe? Does he keep them locked up or something?'

'No.' Roman puts another oreo in his mouth, chewing it slowly as though he's contemplating something. 'You have to understand the people who joined Klein had lost everything due to Virulence. Klein offered them a group which they could join and be part of. Klein is good at making everyone feel valued, making them feel special and part of a bigger cause. He tells them they are the survivors, the best of humanity. He's made it like one big extended family and because of that, no one wants to leave because if you left you'd go alone. They wouldn't simply let you take your children, especially if Klein believes it may be his. Ethel had to leave her son behind.' Roman shakes his head. 'Haiden told me you were really close with your brother back at your settlement. Do you miss him?'

'All the time. I miss my parents too.'

'Then you can understand how hard it would be to choose to leave your family.'

I nod. I do know how hard. When Louisa offered me the option of moving to the Techie settlement I didn't take it because of my family. However, I wasn't being abused. 'Did you have any siblings?'

'I had an older sister.'

'But she didn't survive?'

'I don't know. She was working at a summer camp on the other side of the country with friends. It was at the beginning of the outbreak when they hadn't made the connection yet. Within a few weeks, reports about a new disease called Virulence were released and everyone was informed to stay indoors. They cancelled all flights, the camp was closed and she phoned to say she was going to start making her way back home by car with her friends. She never arrived,' Roman says. 'I helped Klein look for people for a while. I was secretly hoping I'd find her. I never did.'

'There's a chance she survived, especially if you did.'

'She may have survived Virulence, doesn't mean she survived being killed by someone who thought she was infected.'

'Did that happen a lot?'

'Yes. Especially at the beginning. People were told to stay indoors and many did. But gangs would go around burning houses of anyone they thought were infected, and people still needed to eat so they'd venture out and they'd get killed by the same gangs who thought they were helping stop the spread of Virulence. It was pointless though, it affected all animals. The government started burning forests, spraying pesticides, killing all animals to stop the spread until Virulence finished the job for them by killing everything that wasn't resistant.' Roman frowns. 'I'm surprised the place you came from survived if they aren't resistant.'

'Everyone moved into their cabin and didn't leave for months. A lot of people died of Virulence in their cabins during the quarantine period but some survived. The entire area was cleared and sprayed with pesticides multiple times by people from Zach's settlement.' I place another spoonful of honey into my mouth. 'It's sad to think once all the honey in the world has been eaten there are no more bees to make more.'

'Yep, because out of everything you two have been blabbering about, the prospect of honey running out really brings a tear to my eye,' Cas says sarcastically sitting up, her face creased from sleep. 'Thanks for waking me up by the way.' She rubs her face before it creases in disgust. 'I really do stink.'

I roll my eyes and offer Cas the packet of Oreos. She crawls forward and takes three, quickly stuffing them into her mouth. 'Pass the honey.'

I hand her a new spoon and the jar of honey. She digs a spoon in and looks at Roman. 'How much longer till we get to your freaky abusive eco-village?' She pops the spoonful of honey in her mouth.

'Possibly late this afternoon,' Roman says.

'Let's get going then. I can't wait to see the look on Zach's face when his ex turns up to save him. You're a clever girl, Kit. He'll have to get back with you after this.' Cas digs her spoon into the jar again as she stands.

'That is not why I'm doing this,' I say angrily. Why am I doing this? Because I want answers. I want to know where it went wrong. I can't let him get hurt.

'Sure it isn't.' Cas pops the spoon in her mouth then hands me the jar of honey.

Cas grabs her bicycle and mounts it. Roman flashes me a sympathetic smile which only irritates me. Does he think that's the only reason I'm going after Zach?

I love Zach but I don't want to be with him if he truly doesn't love me.

I'm not that pathetic.

Author's Note

They're getting closer...