Water // Matty Healy ♣ The 1975

13. paper

Matty was asleep, it was past ten o'clock in the morning. 

Sylvia had popped into my room to give me a cup of coffee that wasn't really the tastiest thing in the world. 

I was sitting on our scorched bed, my legs crossed over and the mug sitting in between them. 

I was fully aware that I looked horrendous.

I brought the mug up to my mouth and sipped it slowly, glancing over at Matty who was still asleep.

His hair was tossed over his face, his eyes tightly screwed shut, his mouth a straight line. I reached over and gently stroked his hair out of his face. 

I smiled as I played with the wavy locks. 

I expected his eyes to open, and me to be caught with my hand pretty much feeling up his scalp. I waited for embarrassment, but it never came. 

After it started getting weird for me, I removed my hand gently, not missing the opportunity to brush my fingertips across his stubbly cheeks.

"You need to shave." I whispered, obviously not expecting him to hear me.

"I know." he said. I jumped back, removing my hand from his chin.

His mouth turned up into a grin and his eyes opened, crinkling up as he chuckled.

"Um, sorry." I said, blushing furiously.

I directed my gaze away from his face and up to the cracked, cream coloured ceiling.

Sunlight was peeking through the curtains and lighting up the room in a dim orange glow.

I squinted, the light catching my eyes, stunning me briefly.

"Your eyes are blue." he said, his face still squished against the pillow.

"Really? I hadn't noticed." I rolled my eyes, but I still grinned at what he had said.

"No, I mean, like, I'd noticed, obviously. But they're nice." he said. I blushed, looking at my kneecaps, hoping he wouldn't notice and if he did that he wouldn't bring it up.

"T-thanks." I stuttered, taking another sip of my coffee.

Matty laughed.

When he laughed, I felt so happy, because he was.

I laughed as well.

"I'm going to get dressed." I said, handing him my cup of the worst coffee on the planet that was still pretty much full, then I got off the bed and grabbed my underwear, a pair of black jeans, a black vest top and a sheer plaid patterned top. 

I walked into the bathroom, washed, got dressed then pulled my hair up into a high pony tail. 

I stared into the mirror for about three minutes, debating whether or not I should put make up on, I decided against it, then I walked out. 

My body realised what Matty was doing before my mind did. 

"What are you doing?" I asked, bitterness invading my voice as I stormed towards him, taking the sheet of paper away from him. 

I stared down into the faces of my mum, dad and seven year old Elizabeth.

"What the fuck were you doing?"

Matty stared at me, his lips parted, had I not been so furious, I would have found it cute or something stupidly romantic like that.

"Matty, what the fuck were you doing going through my stuff?" my hands shook as I stormed past him towards my bedside table. I opened the top drawer that I had previously filled with photographs, old notepads and my books and I gently placed it inside the cover of The Bell Jar.