Water // Matty Healy ♣ The 1975

6. wine

I thought I'd be okay after some sleep.

Unfortunately, it was easier said than done and it took me four hours to drift off before I woke up two hours later in a cold sweat.

My breathing was uneven, my chest rising and falling as  tried my hardest to remember the dream, but it had left my mind. 

I wiped my forehead gently and turned my head slightly to make sure Matty was still asleep, and sure enough, he was cold out. 

I untangled our legs gently, careful not to disturb him. 

The minute I got out of the safety of the blankets, a draught ripped around my body. 

I shivered, scooting along so that I was sitting on the edge of the bed. I buried my head in my hands and stayed still for about ten minutes. 

Before I new it, my hands were searching the floor for my thick, navy blue cardigan. I reached it and pushed my frail arms through the sleeves. 

I stood up, wobbling slightly as I made my way  to the door. 

The bronze door knob froze my hand as I twisted it to open the door. I slipped out and shut it behind me. 

My hands found the stair rail, and I propped myself up on it, trying to make my way to the kitchen without falling over. 

When I got downstairs, the light was on in the kitchen. I frowned slightly as I walked in. I was about to turn it off, but I heard Sylvia's voice. 

"Hi." she said. I jumped. 

"Oh my god, you scared me." I admitted, moving to sit down opposite her at the table. 

I stared at the pine wood, it was a cheap, probably secondhand table that looked lik it had either belonged to a nursery or an art student, due to all of the paint and glitter all over it. There was scrapes in it, but I was pretty sure they were made after it arrived in their house. 

I looked up ever so slightly and caught sight of an open wine bottle on the table. It was some cheap red stuff, the kind of thing that you got for three quid at Lidl. 

"Couldn't sleep?" she asked. I nodded my head. 

She pushed the wine bottle across the table towards me. I grabbed it by the neck and took a swig of it, I shut my eyes as it rolled down my throat, trying not to show a look of complete and utter disgust. 

"What about you?" I asked. 

"I'm just a night-owl, really." she shrugged her shoulders, I laughed slightly. 

"Really?" 

"Nah, it's just an excuse to get drunk without anyone telling me not to." she explained. I handed the bottle back to her. 

Everything looked different in the early morning. 

Despite the light being on, everything felt dark, and more so than it did during the night, due to the fat that nobody else was up. 

I rolled my head backwards so that it was resting on the back of the chair. 

"Spill." Sylvia spoke up after about three more gulps. 

"I don't think I can." I said quietly. 

"Believe it or not, we have more of this crap than food. How much will it take you?" she asked, passing the bottle back to me. 

"Not much. I'm a lightweight." I said.

People would probably be surprised to hear that I knew how much alcohol it would take me to get completely hammered if they knew about my situation at home- my old home. But believe it or not, four a.m rises weren't a rare occurrence for me, and I knew exactly where dad kept his alcohol. 

However, Sylvia was the last person I would have wanted to tell. She seemed really nice, but I knew she'd tell someone, it would probably be an accident, but still.. I wanted to rebuild myself.

I didn't tell Sylvia, but we both got pretty hammered, well, Sylvia did. I, on the other hand, was still tying my hardest to cling onto sobriety.

At about nine o'clock, Sylvia stood up, her legs wobbling a little bit.

"I'm gonna go to bed." she said, rubbing her eyes.

"I will too, in a minute."  I lied. 

"Okay, night." she said, before making her way upstairs.

There were about fifteen minutes of loneliness after that. 

I finished the little bit at the bottom on the wine bottle and left it on the table in front of me. I stared through the dark green glass, creating the deluded impression that it was more expensive than it actually as.

Matty was the first one to come down, which I was glad about. I didn't feel like I could handle the others at that time. 

When he saw the wine bottle he raised an eyebrow. 

"How long have you been up?" he asked. I shrugged. 

"About four. Sylvia was here too, but she went to bed about fifteen minutes ago." I said. 

He picked up the wine bottle and laughed slightly. 

"You've gotten drunk off this?" he mocked me, I glared at him. 

"I'm not drunk." I argued. 

"Trust me, Lizzy. I've seen a lot of drunk people in my time, and I've known them well enough to know that you're completely out of it." he said. 

"Shut up, you sound like an old man. 'When I was young' type of thing." 

"I never said that."

"No, but you said 'in my time,' which is about as good as anything." 

Matty sighed, rolling his eyes at me in mock disbelief.

He walked towards the cupboards and rummaged through them, looking for something.

Eventually, he managed to get his hands on a glass. He filled it with water, then walked to the freezer, pulled it open and found himself some ice cubes. He took a hand full out and dropped them in the glass, which was now full to the brim. He sipped at the drink a bit, making the water level lower, the handed it to me.

"Drink it. You need to sober up a little." he explained.

I looked at the cup and took it from him. I drank it all within less than two minutes.

"You should probably get some sleep." he said, sitting opposite me. I nodded.  

He grinned at me. 

"Such a typical sixteen year old," he laughed at me as I slowly arose and made my way to the door. "Can I eat your leftover dinner from last night?" he asked. I rolled my eyes.

"Knock yourself out."