The Unknown Road

70 - Tessa

I can hear plates clinking downstairs, so I decide to stay in pyjamas for now, wanting to get food in my belly first before attempting to pack the last few things. I head down the stairs and I almost trip on the last step when I see Archie standing with Dad at the cooker, turning over the bacon and keeping an eye on a cheese and pepper omelette, which was probably for me.

Conversation stops as everyone spots me, and I didn't miss the way Dad and Millie suddenly made themselves scarce.

He doesn't move, but after a minute of me basically gawping at him, he gives me an awkward wave.

"Hey."

As much as I wanted to leap into his arms and pretend things are okay, I know they're not, so I keep a cool expression and try not to give in to my inner excitement at both seeing him downstairs for the first time in days and him speaking to me.

"Hey," I say back.

His eyes look me up and down before he turns back to the omelette. "You excited about university?" He asks, his question sounding extremely forced. I hate how awkward things have got between us. His half of our dream has been postponed because of the accident and now I was abandoning him to my half. It wasn't fair. If only he knew I wanted to wait until we could do it together, just like we planned.

I shrug as my answer and sit down on the chair furthest away from him. "It feels weird to be going. But I suppose I am, yeah."

He nods and turns to look at me before shaking his head and turning away again. He looks so broken still, and as he turns away, and I spot the fresh cut on the back of his head.

"What happened to you yesterday Archie?" I ask, trying to keep my voice flat.

He shakes his head. "Nothing. I, erm... I went to the park. I lost my footing on the way out and slipped. Hit my head." He turns and points to it. That would certainly explain Millie's sudden dash out the door, but I still don't quite believe that's what happened. He's always been a terrible liar...

"You okay now?" I ask and he nods.

"It was nothing. Just a bump."

I nod. He clearly didn't want to tell me the truth, so why should I even bother asking. But then when he suddenly turns around and takes the seat next to me, I think I might about to be proven wrong.

"Tess, I'm sorry. I just... When we got home everyone was here and I... I freaked out and I acted in the wrong way and I-I... I just didn't know what to say or do."

When Dad asked if it would help having everyone here, I thought it would. Having all my friends round me - people that knew Matt - really helped me so I thought it would help him too. But when he stormed off and slammed the door, not appearing for three days, I knew it was clearly the wrong thing to do. Because of that I hadn't wanted to push him, and I left him alone until he was comfortable to come to us. I don't know whether that was wrong either, but I'd never felt so unsure in our relationship and I hated it. 

"No, Archie, I'm sorry. It's my fault they were there." I take his hand quickly, before he can pull it away, and he puts his other hand over mine, smiling. "I'm sorry," I repeat.

He looks up and I think I see a small spark of brightness in his eyes, but before I can smile back at him, the brightness is gone.

"I wish I could come with you," he says, standing to sort the pan of bacon, which was now starting to smell mouthwatering.

"Me too. I'm really going to miss you Arch."

He turns and flashes me a forced smile. "Me too." His voice sounds pained, and I'm wondering what the hell is going through his mind. "But try not to miss me too much okay?" He says, trying to joke, but it doesn't sound like he's joking at all.