anonymous ♧ kim namjoon au

anonymous ; epilogue

Pakiramdam ko may masamang nangyayari. But why? Bakit ngayon pa?

Ngayong araw na to?

Monthsary namin. I wanted to surprise her, I wanted to treat her to a five star restaurant, but I couldn't find her. Nasaan ba siya?!

Kung sino sino na rin ang tinawagan ko. Shit, kahit nga si Hyungwon, tinawagan ko na pero wala pa din!

I stopped. I noticed there were tears in my eyes. Why is a day without her so painful? Could it be that I am so inlove with her, it actually hurts?

Does she... still love me?

I shook my head. Naaalala ko nanaman. Ano nanaman bang nagpaalala sa akin nung araw na yun? Tatlong buwan na ang nakalipas nun!

Yun na nga. Technically, dahil tatlong buwan na ang nakalipas, she either ran away from me or didn't like me anymore and was too scared to tell me pero hindi niya masabi. That's what I watch in movies. But Ayen, my Ayen isn't like that, right?

"Bangtan, you're on in five seconds,"

Natapos na kami sa pagperform at iinterviewhin nalang kami. Nakaupo kami ngayon, katabi yung mag iinterview which is actually Heechul hyung.

Kinakabahan ako.

Ayen, I wish you were here to calm me down. Holding your hands calm me down.

"Hah, so you guys have been worldwide sensations for years now! Anong masasabi niyo naman sa mga fans niyo?" Sabi ni Heechul, and I gave him a smile.

"We love them, really. They're not just fans, for us. They're also family." Sabi ko, and ngumiti naman siya habang tumatango.

"Nah, boring questions yan. Dito tayo sa mga mas maganda. Anong current status ninyo, with your girlfriends, or kung meron man kayo?" Sabi ni Heechul, and Jhope awkwardly laughed.

"Just so everyone knows, I'm single," sabi ni Jhope, and nag aegyo pa. I shook my head.

"I'm married. With Charlene Mendez." Sabi ni Yoongi, causing a small smile to crack on his lips.

"I am engaged. With Hanjin Lee! Hey, you heard it here first! You're invited, sunbaenim," sabi ni Jin, at nagtawanan naman yung audience.

"Well, Margaux and I are talking about our future," sabi ni Jimin, giving a sweet smile.

"Marione and I are gonna have our wedding either this year or early next year. You're also invited, sunbaenim!" Sabi ni V, and everyone started squealing.

"Well, um, Chloe and I are still young so we aren't talking about that. But I'm not planning on letting her go anytime soon. Hah, akala niya madali lang makatakas sa akin?" Sabi ni Jungkook, and nagtilian naman yung audience.

"Namjoon?" Sabi ni Heechul, and I smiled.

"I'm missing my baby. But I know she loves me, and I love her so much, too," sabi ko, giving him a smile. Nag-aww naman yung audience and I shook my head.

Sa pagkakaalala ko, ayaw nila kay Chienne. Ano to ngayon? I sighed, pero sana hindi nakuha yun sa camera.

Nang matapos na kami sa filming at papunta na kami sa van ay bigla namang nagvibrate yung phone ko. Halos manlaki ng sobra ang mga mata ko sa nakita. Napatigil ako sa paglalakad at binasa ng paulit ulit yung nakasulat.

From: Ayen

Hey, you were great back there. And I love you too. So much. Can you turn around?

I blinked rapidly. Sumisikip yung dibdib ko. Ayen, totoo ba to?

Dahan dahan akong lumingon, and halos manghina ako nang makita ko ang mundo ko, habang nakangiti siya ng matamis sa akin.

Her smile was so soft, that I felt it was going to melt my heart. She was wearing a suit which looked kinda hot on her. Heck, no. She was really hot. Especially with her glasses on. Damn.

"Ayen?" Bulong ko, and she nodded at me as her eyes started to be glassy.

"Hyung...? Noona?!" Sabi ni Jungkook, at bago pa siya makasingit ay sinugod ko na siya sa yakap at naramdaman ang pagtaas at pagbaba ng mga balikat niya.

I closed my eyes and then caressed her hair habang pinapakinggan ang pag iyak niya. Ang bilis ng tibok ng puso ko, at hindi ko alam kung paano ko sasabihin sa kanya na mahal na mahal ko siya.

"Ayen? Mahal na mahal kita. Hindi nagbago yun kahit na nawala ka. Ikaw, ha? Iniwan mo ako. Pero masaya ako kasi nandito ka na. Wag mo na ulit gagawin yun. Saan ka ba nagpunta? Pinag alala mo ako ng sobra sobra. I think about you day and night, baby," sabi ko sa kanya, and her breathing calmed.

Humiwalay siya sa yakap, and then she gazed at my eyes. She looked so innocent I wanted to be the one to take that innocence off someday. Someday.

"I'm sorry, Joon, I'm sorry. I was appointed ceo of our Japan branch, and I didn't have a choice. They took me away from you and our friends. Even family. But it's alright now. I love you so damn much, Namjoon. I can give up the company if only it meant being able to see you even secretly," sabi niya, and I shook my head.

"Damn it, Ayen. I fucking fell in love with you, my anonymous, but I never and never ever will regret any of it. Will you marry me?"

"Yes!"

And that was how it started. Because loving her doesn't have an ending.