"I wish I could just fucking cut it all off." she muttered. 

I raised an eyebrow. 

"No you don't." I said. 

I moved around slightly, dipping into the back pocket and producing a packet of cigarettes and a lighter. 

She stared at me, I had never seen her looking so upset. 

She closed her eyes and exhaled gently, like it took all of her body and soul just to be able to breath. 

"I know the feeling. I just want weed." I told her, she let out a single, quiet laugh that sounded like it physically hurt her.

"Could I?" she asked, her eyes still shut. I was slightly scared that if I stopped talking to her she might have died or something. 

I nodded, hoping that she could feel it, seeing as she couldn't see it, because I didn't think I could manage speaking either. 

I lit up a cigarette and handed it to her so that she could take the first drag.

--------

Elizabeth's POV

Matty laughed as I started coughing. 

I smiled with my eyes shut. 

"Shut up." I said, opening my eyes and passing the cigarette back to him. 

I knew he wasn't looking for me, he had no reason to, but I ddin't want to cause an argument, so I kept my mouth closed and he did the same.

"Look." he said, I looked at him with narrowed eyes. 

He inhaled a lot of smoke and blew it out in rings into my face. I frowned at him and eventually started laughing.

I watched the ashes fall from the end of the cigarette onto the bed sheets, creating small, rough holes.

He passed the cigarette back to me and I tried to do the same as him, but it just ended up coming out as a large cloud of smoke, in stead of rings. 

He coughed and I grinned in triumph, however, on the inside I still felt sickened by life.

I passed it back to him and he looked at me as it hung out of the corner of his mouth, he looked like one of those cowboys from the old films, with grass tucked snugly in between their teeth.

"You know what?" he spoke quietly.

"What?" I asked. 

"I'm really scared." he told me. 

"So am I." I replied. 

He looked slightly hurt. 

"You're not going to ask why?" he asked. 

"Okay, why, Matty?" I braced myself for some stupid answer that would surely come out of his mouth. 

"Because if people can treat you like that, then god knows what they'd do to me."

I looked at him and sighed. 

"Nothing. They'd do nothing, Matty." I said. 

He handed me the cigarette and I took a long drag. I tried not to succumb to the powers of the tickling in the back of my throat, and I simply exhaled slowly. 

Matty held my hand. 

I put the cigarette to his lips and he smiled at me. 

"You look so cool." I muttered. He grinned at me. 

"So do you." he exhaled into my face again and I removed my hand from his to slap his arm.  

"No I don't. I look like an over emotional teenage girl. Which is what I am." I frowned. 

"We're all over emotional teenage girls at heart." he put the cigarette to my lips like I did to him, and I smiled. 

Eventually, Matty put the cigarette out and we both ended up talking for ages. 

"I want a cat." I said. 

"So do I, but they hate me." he said, frowning, deep in thought. 

"I'm sure they don't. Maybe you just scare then a bit." I suggested. 

"Nah, they always run away. They never come back." 

"I'm sorry, Matty. Are we talking about cats or your love life? I got kind of lost." I said, smirking. He frowned at me and I laughed. He did the same. 

It was a nice night. 

-----

a/n

I'M SORRY FOR MAKING YOU ALL WAIT FOR WHAT SEEMS LIKE FOREVER. I WAS SUFFERING FROM WRITERS BLOCK, I'M SORRY!!!

I hope you all enjoyed thiiiiis. :3 

Water // Matty Healy ♣ The 1975Where stories live. Discover now