The Siren's Curse ✓

14. Left in the Past

"You know, the only reason I wanted that sword so much is because I wanted to feel closer to her. She was obsessed with the story about it when we were younger. She always talked about going on an adventure and trying to find it one day," he explained, keeping his eyes down at his hands.

"I'm sure she'd be happy to know that you found it for her," I said carefully. I feared that if I said the wrong thing or spoke the wrong way, he might break down again. "It sounds like she was an amazing person."

He finally met my eyes. "You remind me so much of her. You have the same stubbornness, the same determination and toughness that she had. And you have the same heart," he sighed, "We found you a year after she died. Through the first few years of you being with us, I realized how much I was starting to care about you. Any time we'd go on a mission and had to fight or do something dangerous, I would feel sick to my stomach thinking about how I might lose you like I lost her. I had to push you away to try to stop caring about you." He looked at me regretfully, with a tinge of coldness still in his eyes. "I should still be pushing you away."

"Hoseok," I gripped onto his forearm desperately, "Please, don't keep pushing me away. I know you're scared of getting hurt again, but you can't let that fear control you. I could get hurt, you're right, but that doesn't mean you should stop yourself from being close to me. You can't just ignore your feelings and push them down in an attempt to protect yourself... Please let me back in. I miss you," I whispered the last part, feeling warm tears pool in my eyes.

The stony expression that had slowly been building up on his face again came crashing down when he saw my desperation. He grabbed my shoulders and brought me into his arms, pulling me against him tightly. I wrapped my arms around his back and let out a shaky breath of relief.

"I'm sorry. Just please, please don't leave me," he said weakly. My chest throbbed painfully as I heard the brokenness in his voice.

"I won't."

* * *

Hoseok left my room a little while later. I decided to change my clothes before dinner would be ready, making sure to put a new shirt on in order to hide the fresh wound that Hoseok's sword had given me. The cut was deep and went from the front of my shoulder across to my collarbone. I didn't have time to dress it yet, so I just ignored the painful throbbing it gave me as I put on a black top.

Dinner that night was tense. Though the crew didn't know what had happened between Hoseok and me, they quickly picked up on our somber mood. Hoseok had reopened a scar from his past and I felt some of his pain seep into my own heart as a result of him letting me in.

The two of us were quiet while the rest of the crew chattered amongst each other, only occasionally glancing at us. They probably thought it was best to not ask about whatever had happened. Yoongi was the only one who really seemed concerned, evident from the questioning looks he kept sending me. Whenever I happened to look towards him, he would raise his eyebrow as if asking, 'What happened? Are you alright?' I simply shook my head and continued eating.

Of course, this only made Yoongi grow even more concerned. When I had finally finished my food and excused myself from the table, he wasted no time in standing up after me. He followed me silently to my room and I didn't even bother closing my door, knowing he'd come in behind me.

"Yoongi, you really don't have to worry about me. I'm fine," I said with my back facing him. I moved to my dresser and grabbed the hairbrush that lied on top of it. Pulling my braid out, I began brushing my long hair, wanting to keep myself busy.

"Kat, don't tell me not to worry about you. It's not going to happen, okay? Something is clearly bothering you, so talk to me." I could hear him step closer to me but I refused to turn around. I could feel my emotions rising, filling me to the brim and begging to overflow.