16) Guilt Is Painful

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"Why did you lead me on this long!?"Veronica said. Tears rolled down her face and she pulled something out of her purse.

It was two airplane tickets. Veronica was broken. After their argument she looked into gender identity and broadened her mind. She did that because she loves Cheryl. Veronica had the perfect girl at the perfect school with the perfect life.

But Cheryl didn't want her. It was even harder because she never got broken up with. She was usually on the other side.

"I'm sorry" Cheryl said trying to calm the other girl down.

But it was failing. Veronica ripped the tickets in half.She was in pain

"Cheryl I loved you! And this is how you treat me?!"

Cheryl didn't know what to say. She tried to stay with Veronica but she just couldn't. Cheryl sat on the couch.

Veronica still stood and was trying to make sense of the situation. But she couldn't. She thought things were going great between them.

"Toni"

"It was fucking her..."Veronica fell to her knees and cried.

She really loved Cheryl. It was so hard to hear. She believed they were going places but it was taken from her.

She sobbed for a couple minutes but soon she got herself together. She stood up and walked towards Cheryl. She looked in her eyes and she finally understood why she was so distant.

Veronica gave Cheryl a hug before leaving.

Cheryl felt horrible because she didn't even care. She wanted to feel bad for hurting Veronica, but instead she felt bad for not feeling bad.

She went to kitchen table and worked on school work.Veronica left her mind with in the span of 15 minutes .Cheryl didn't want to be bothered anymore.

Sure what she did was kind of wrong, but in her defense everything was moving so quickly and she was confused.

Toni heard everything and decided to give Cheryl a bit of space considering the fact she was why they broke up. What Toni didn't know is that Cheryl wasn't even thinking about Veronica.

Cheryl was busy doing work. Toni was busy doing work. Sooner or later Toni decided to join Cheryl at the table. The table that some pretty good things for them happened on.

There was a weird feeling in the air. Like a tension between them not like their usual one. This one carries weight. Instead of them wanting to kiss each other they longed for something else. Maybe a cuddle or to watch a movie.

Toni was happy just sitting next to her doing work.

"So..."Cheryl mumbled

She didn't know where to go in their 'relationship' and her words reflected it.

"So...."Toni mimicked

There was a longer silence after that. Neither of them knowing what to say. But it was fine. It wasn't awkward. They were both busy anyway.

They were fine.

Fine.

Fine was over when they were finished.
Cheryl stood and walked to the fridge to pull out a few things to cook. She wasn't sure what she'd make and first but it soon turned into angel hair pasta with pesto.

Fine turned into awkwardness.

"Is she ok?"Toni asked finally addressing the elephant in the room.

Cheryl put the pasta in the water and huffed.

"She'll be fine"Cheryl answered.

But to be honest she wasn't sure if what she was going to be ok.

Toni smiled and genuinely believed Cheryl. Toni finally looked up from her work to see Cheryl. She admired Cheryl as she cooked.

Cheryl was in leggings and a tank top with a sloppy bun on top of her head ,but to Toni she was beautiful. Her skin glowed and Toni was blushing at the sight.

Cheryl looked over at Toni and smiled.

"I'm a mess Toni . Aren't I?" she asked.

"oh if only you could see it my way"Toni said.

Cheryl walked over to give her a peck on the cheek.

The two girls ate and watched Netflix as usual but now Toni's legs were on Cheryl's lap. Every now and then Toni would lean up and kiss Cheryl every time she reminded herself how lucky she was.

When the time neared 10:00pm Cheryl got up from the cousins began to walk to her room.

"Wait Cheryl where are you going?"Toni asked and she stood up too.

Cheryl smiled.

"To bed silly" she answered

Toni laughed at her.
"Wouldn't it be better to come cuddle with me in my bed?"Toni suggested.

Cheryl blushed and smiled.
"It would be a change ... let me think about it " she teased.

Toni huffed.
"Oh Cheryl please....."

"As long as I'm the big spoon"
Cheryl said

Toni internally laughed and walked to her room with Cheryl. Toni knew she was the big spoon but she'll light Cheryl take her position tonight.

When they woke up Toni's arms were wrapped around Cheryl despite her best efforts.

For the next two weeks that's how the girls were. They did the same thing over and over again. They worked together, Cheryl made dinner they watched a movie and Toni spooned Cheryl in bed.

But Toni was thinking of taking the girl somewhere special. Like really special. It wasn't to hard for her to plan it considering her family is what they like to call 'comfortable' and what others call rich.

So one morning she was determined to take the girl somewhere special. She landed on the perfect place and got to work. She wanted to show Cheryl just how much she meant to her.

So she hid it from her as best as she could and tomorrow she'd take her on the weekend of a lifetime.

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