SLEEPSONG (BoyxBoy)✔️

Chapter 53

Without a word, he handed me the bag and I blinked before opening it up; I was expecting bleach and toner but instead I found myself looking at a box of auburn-looking hair dye.

"Uh, I needed bleach and toner to go blonde," I quietly laughed, looking at him with a grateful smile, "but, thanks... the thought was sweet."

"There's no mistake here," Sebastian growled, eyes flashing and narrowing at me; I stared at him, my smile fading, since he looked serious. "I specifically asked her for this."

Confusion filled me and I started to frown. "Why did you do that?"

Instead of responding verbally, he lifted his hand and cupped the side of my cheek. Then he slid his fingers past my ear to glide them through my hair. His eyes were no longer on mine, they were on my roots, on my brows, on the things that made me sad... the color that made me sad.

"Your natural hair color is rare and beautiful," he grunted, mouth tightening. "This man you always talk about, the one you supposedly dated for fifteen years... he was an idiot."

"But, he wasn't! He was smart, and well-respected!" I protested, face tightening. "He said--"

"Forget what he said!" Sebastian snarled, and I flinched at the aggression; he took a deep breath and started again a little more calmly. "Forget what he said... because I'm saying in the here and now that no matter how you look, I still... think you are... beautiful. You have nothing to hide, either. Your natural hair color is rich... and if I'm guessing correctly, it shifts in the light, too."

I twitched, startled, since he was actually spot-on about that: before I'd started dying my hair, that little factoid had actually been one of the things I'd loved most about it.

"How do you know that?" I scoffed. "You can barely see it! It's only an inch long!"

"I've seen people with your hair type and color in the distant past," he informed me, eyeing my roots a little more carefully. "Believe me when I say that your hair color is rare. Perhaps not as rare as being a natural ginger, or a blonde... but still, it's rare."

"And how can you tell that at a glance?"

"Do you think I'm color blind or something?" he growled, scowling at me. "It's not quite a red but not quite a brown, either... its a mixed shade in between. Like the fur of a fox, but sleek."

Well... he did have a point. That was, in fact, my hair color.

Russet brown.

"Okay, so," I mumbled, looking at the Auburn dye, "you want me to dye my hair red?"

"No," Sebastian immediately growled, and I flinched. "What I want is for you to... not... always feel uncomfortable with your looks and to... like... everything... about yourself. I want you... to be able to look in the mirror... and see yourself... and feel good about what you see."

He seemed to be struggling with how to put his thoughts into words, as usual, but in a way I sort of understood what he was doing and why he was doing it. I felt myself go a little warm. There was a part of me that found this gesture equal parts endearing and overly excessive.

Then again... he also had a point.

Maybe by sticking to the standards that... he... had laid out for me during those years, I'd been preventing myself from being able to move forward all the way. We weren't together anymore so there wasn't really a need to keep dying my hair blonde, was there?

I mean, I looked fucking adorable as a blonde, and I did like myself that way... but I could always go back to it, and perhaps switching things up for once would be a good way to break out of my shell and truly start healing. Maybe it would allow me to try letting go of the past, for real.