Chapter 5

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I gasped shocked at what the nurse had just told me. I was about to cry but then i thought about it. I cant cry infront of paul and john! They will think im a wuss. So insted i pulled a pillow from underneath me and screamed and screamed until i could scream no more. Someone had pulled the pillow off my face and when i opened my eyes i saw john.

I was falling. No one could catch me and i was falling. A black never ending tunnel was plummeting beneath me and i was being swallowed by the hard hospital bed. I woke up with a thud on a concrete floor. I was in an alley. The same alley.

FLASHBACK

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I ran down the street away from my dad until i found my self in an alley with a hard concrete floor. I fell down with loss of breath when i cought my breath I stood up gaining some balance. I felt pain whack my head. I ran my hands through my hair. When i looked up there was a figure. Standing with a bat in his hand and a hat on his head. "Whats a pretty bird like you doing here?" I steped back only to find myself in the arms of another man around 20. I was only 10. The first man asked my name as i kicked him where no man would want to be kicked. He whacked me round the head with the bat and stripped me of my dress. I was beaten till bloody. Someone must have found me because i was in hospital.

END OF FLASHBACK

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I didnt want that to happen again so i forced my eyes to open only to shut them again because of the blinding light. Paul was asleep by my side with john sat next to him. John had something in his hand. A letter. On the front it read ' Bella, if you wake and i am asleep open this letter.' I tugged it out of his grip and carfully opened it. Inside it read;

'Bella, i am sorry for your loss with your mam last time i was about to get shot. But this time i am truly thankful for your saving me. If you were not there or you were a minute later. You would have lost Mr. Lennon. No but really i am truly sorry for you loss again of your ovary. The nurse told me that you cannot have a child now. This must be sad for you. I am so sorry love, John.'

My mind was not fixed on the letter though. Something cought my eye. I had always wanted a child when it came to the time. I stared at this object wondering what would happen if i did. No i couldnt it would kill Paul. Although he only just found me a month ago. I notest some wrapped pressents by the object and a baloon reading happy birthday. I smiled it was my 14th birthday. My mind wandered back to the object and i jumped out of bed grabbing the object a sprinting to the ladies. I looked in the mirror. Then down to my hand.

I screamed out in pain. I had to muffle my mouth with my hand so no one would hear me. I cut again. The sharpness of the razor sliding across my skin. By the time a minute had passed my whole left arm was bloody. Another minute and my right arm too. By the time i finished my right thigh all of my limbs were covered in blood. As the bathroom door opened i collapsed.

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