uoıʇıɹɐdsıᗡ

ᴄɪɴQᴜᴀɴᴛᴀᴄɪɴQᴜᴇ - ᴘᴀꜱᴛ

I don't like the memories because the tears come easily, and once again I break my promise to myself for this day. It's a constant battle. A war between remembering and forgetting. ~ Unknown.

Valentinia:

Past (2 years ago).

Two months. Two months, have passed since I absconded from my husband's grasp. Two months, since the most dreadful section of my life; the pain. However, the scars till litter my skin just as visible as the day they were formed. Eternal. Eight weeks, since I had conjured a job in Italy and eight weeks since I had experienced the best days I have lived.

It's truly astonishing how you can allocate from your darkest chapter to your lightest. Opposing sides. An eclipse. The sphere rotated, allowing the light to finally consume the dark, in which had become before this day had become an everyday, ongoing cycle of my life.

Initially, I assumed that I would never be here, in this position today. My life had once taken a turn for the worst. However, I was here. Alive. Something I once thought was impossible.

"Nothing is impossible". Audrey Hepburn's voice echoed throughout my crowded unconscious. Her vocabulary held an aspect of validity because a variety of phenomenon's were conceivable. However, some things are unfeasible; situations in which you are placed within.

Personally, in my opinion, you don't understand the extent of the word 'possible' until you experience an era in your life that causes you to question its flexibility.

My life is finally beginning to show purpose, but I wouldn't be here today if it wasn't for Elia and Delilah. They have been my motivation and inspiration into holding my head up high and fighting myself, to fight for my life. My freedom.

My life is successful for now; but, he's still here. Alive. Breathing. Watching. He must believe that I am so naïve and senseless that I wouldn't notice someone had been following me. Observing their prey, before reporting back to their 'master'.

It truly sickens me how he still has a hold on me and I guarantee that he will for a long, long time, if not for the rest of my life. But, I will not let him dominate my life anymore. From now on, I control my life. Not him. Not anyone.

My life has finally been given some purpose, I finally have a positive output on life. I'm not entirely miserable anymore and I only have Elia and Delilah to thank for that. If it wasn't for them, I wouldn't be here right now, working a job in which I enjoyed and I wouldn't be surrounded by people whom I genuinely liked.

Thank you to them, I'm not blared at, manipulated or mistreated every day. I smile. I am grateful and I have been allowed to watch the star's flutter in scintillation each apparent sundown and observe the cycle of dawn. It's truly breath-taking. Captivating.

I love watching the formation of a contemporary innocent day, knowing that any worries I had the prior day no longer hold any matter of importance to me. I admired how the colours of the sunset blended, to establish such an effortless art.

However, I know and I tell myself every day not to get too comfortable, this new life could all come crashing down like a tidal wave at any given moment or second. The element lurking sinisterly within the hidden shadows.

The mention of his name still caused my entire being to become stiff and rigid in fear, and I guess that will never be eliminated. I can't forget, no matter how hard I attempted to. But, I can become stronger; physically and mentally. In order, to prepare myself for the day in which he came.