My Best Friend

Chpt 16: Together.

It has been a month since the death of my mother and I've barely left my room. I haven't gone to school. I haven't had a proper meal since either. I haven't talked to anyone. I've just been up in my room. I know I shouldn't shut the people I love out. It's not fair to them. But I don't know. I just... It just hurts so bad. I miss my mother so much. My dad asked me to say a few words at the funeral a couple of weeks ago, but I just couldn't. I couldn't deal with that. I don't know. I'm so stupid.

My dad came in a while ago and told me that him, Ethan and Aiden and going out. Aiden is my cousin who is staying with us for a while. I honestly don't know why though. And why he would choose now. Don't get me wrong, I love Aiden. We're really close but...

Arghh!

There was knock on my door. I sat up on my bed and looked at the door. It opened to reveal Shane. He closed the door softly behind him and leaned back on it. His eyes bored into mine. 

Shane's POV

There she was. Sat on her bed and staring back at me. She looked so broken. It's been a month. A whole month since I last saw her. It's been so hard to stay away from her for this long. I knew she needed her space though. When her dad called me and told me that she was alone and he wanted me to see if I could get through to her, I hopped in my car and raced all the way over here. I heard she hadn't eaten properly for a month and she needs to stop this. She's going to hurt herself.

I watched as she slowly got off her bed and strolled over to me.

"Hi." I said when she was standing in front of me.

Hi? Seriously? That's the best I could do? I'm such an idiot.

She gave me a small smile and then pressed her lips on mine taking me completely by surprise. I stood there motionless for a minute before I started to kiss her back. She pulled me back to her bed, our tongues danced together. She tugged at the bottom of my shirt and started to pull it over my head. I pulled away. The only sounds that could be heard was our ragged breathing. I looked up at her and her eyes held no emotion. I know she's hurting and I know she only did that to release her stress. I would do this with her one day but when she's in the right state of mind.

"What?" she asked. "What's wrong?"

I sighed. "You're not in the right state of mind right now."

Her eyes flashed with anger and she stood up from the bed.

"You don't love me." she said.

My eyes widened at that. "What?" I stood up and walked over to her. "I do love you. Why would you say that?"

"Then why wouldn't you have sex with me?" she shouted.

I reached out my hand to touch her but she pulled back. My heart clenched at that. The girl I love is hurting so much and I can't do anything. I feel so useless.

"Because you're hurting and-"

"Shut up!" she yelled, interrupting me. "Shut up!"

I took a step closer to her. " Ashley."

"Get out!" she screeched.

"No." I said. "I'm not leaving."

"Get out!" she stormed over to her shelf and picked up a vase. 

She was shaking. She threw the vase at the wall and it shattered to a million pieces. She kept screaming for me to get out, tears streaming down her face. She picked up a few more things and threw them at the wall, all making a loud smashing sound when they broke. I rushed over to her and wrapped my arms around her. She pounded on my chest and sobbed.

"Leave." she choked out. "You don't want a screw up like me. You deserve better. You can do better. Leave. Please."

"Shut up." I whispered. "You're not a screw up and you're the best. So I can't do better. We're going to get through this. Together."