so far it's alright

Nine

Closing the door softly, I leaned my head against it sighing.
"Well good morning sis."
My brother was here, guess with all the drama I forgot when he was coming home.
"Looks like you had an interesting evening, eh? Who dropped you off?"
"My friend George we met last week, also mind your damn business. How was your holiday?"
Chris gave me a brief overview of how his time went, showing me a few pictures of himself sitting on a cliff. The last 3 months he decided to go backpacking crazy locations to get pictures, insisting he wanted "live while he's young". My brother planned on going to university this winter and slowly picking up classes as he went.
"I've got some news though. Instead of staying here for school I found a flat downtown, I'll have a roommate but he'll be in school too. Obviously I didn't think you'd mind having room to yourself around here. Although now I see you won't be so alone." He laughed gesturing to my collar bone. My hands flew around my neck yanking my shirt up south my chin.
"Fuck off."
"Does Cam know about this? Is it a revenge thing?"
Sighing I explained the breakup to Chris.
"So Matty introduced me to his friends, I got on great with them so fingers crossed I've made some new friends and I really won't be alone in here all the time."
The two of us were sat at the kitchen table now with tea. He made it known that he wanted to meet them before he moved into his new place next week, suggesting that I have a mini party of some kind.
"Is this just an excuse for you to get trashed for cheap? Or are you going to make me look like a dumbass in front of people I'm just getting to know?"
"Why not both? For real sis I'd give the kid a chance, that is after I meet him and decide if he's a twat or not."
Reluctantly I agree, but Chris suggests I text them now and see who's around tonight. He also asks to invite his future roommate to see if they'll click or not. I send a group message to Caroline, Sam, Chelsea, George, and Gabbie.

Who's around tonight?

Checking the time I decide to head out for a run before I shower, telling Chris where I'll be before I leave. Headphones in, phone in one pocket, trusty pepper spray in the other. I try to rationalize to myself that it's okay if I invite Matty separately from the others, he and I have spent more time together than I have with anyone else. Knowing that I'm just nervous to invite him over again, especially to meet my brother, makes my heart race even more than the pace I'm trying to keep over the course of this run. Each step forward I push the nerves farther and farther out of my head. He's just a boy, a boy that likes you, even if you have a crush you're a grown up both of you can handle it. But could he? Could I?  If I wanted to keep being friends with this new inviting, warm, and fun group of people I could make it work. I'd have to make it work .
Making it back through the neighborhood to my house I felt moderately more confident about texting Matty. I checked my phone for responses to the group text. Sam had texted saying that her and Gabbie could be there, and asked for details on what to bring. Caroline said she'd of course be there, she also texted just me asking why Matty wasn't in the chat. George asked if he could bring the guys and promised booze and weed. I sent out one text to them all.

Come around 9 bring whatever you'd like to drink friends

I made my way to the shower, shouting to Chris that the "party" was on for 9. He shouted back asking if we could hit the store together.
"Yeah obviously just let me shower." I turned the water on putting on some pregame music, even though it was only 3 now I needed to psych myself up to text Matty.

Hey, idk if George or anyone let you know yet but we're getting together at my house tonight around 9 let me know if you're in

Of course I'm in love see you at nine-Matty

Getting in the shower with a smile on my face, I cranked my music up a little more.

Chris and I hop into my car headed to grab beer and whatever else to have in the fridge, along with dinner for the two of us. He's already dressed ready to party in blue jeans and a fitted grey shirt, with a flannel that was definitely mine to keep himself warm. I however had just thrown on black leggings and a State Champs cropped hoodie, no makeup, and hair tied in messy braids.
"Dude why'd you have to get dressed already I look like a bum. What if we run into anyone."
He laughed heckling me for caring what anyone thinks about how I'm dressed.
We got into the store collecting a few snack items and taking our carriage to the alcohol section.
"Hey Jace, when was the last time you spoke to Rowan?"
"Probably a year why?"
"Looks like you're about to again." He rose his brows at me just as I got a bear hug from behind.
"JASEEEEYYYY! Babe how've you been, I miss you! Looks like you're getting ready to throw one of your ragers when is it?" I'm fairy sure she didn't even breath the entire time she'd been speaking to me, she definitely hadn't blinked.
"Hey, we're just hanging out with some people." Rowan made me uncomfortable now, after what happened the night I met Cam she had told me off for not wanting to go out and party like she still did. For several months she would show up at my house yelling at me for not meeting her when she asked me to. Cam, and Caroline had done most of the deflecting when she came around until she eventually met someone and gave up on me.
"How's Cam? Will he and Caroline be around too? I'd love to see everyone."
"It's just some of my friends Rowan. Wouldn't be any fun for you." Chris could sense the stress and panic I felt around her. He seamlessly stepped between her and I taking hold of the trolley we'd filled up. "It was good seeing you though, maybe we'll see you around again."
I waved to Rowan silently, following Chris up to the registers. He made small talk with the clerk  while I paid, keeping my eyes peeled so Rowan couldn't sneak up on me again.  The last thing I needed right now was to let myself fall apart over nothing I told myself. She's just asking to be polite.
"Think she'll try to show up tonight?" Chris asked.
"I fucking hope not."
She was not someone I wanted back in my life, and especially not in Matty's.