so far it's alright

Five

The morning went by far to quick and in 15 short minutes I would have to confront Cam, in person, about our relationship. My manager, and coincidentally favorite coworker Gina, plops down next to me with an expectant glare.
"Look hun, I know no one actually likes working, but you've been glaring at the clock every time I look up what's wrong?"
"I broke up with Cam Friday, we're meeting for lunch to talk."
"That good for nothing ass what did he do to you this time?" Gina was very protective of me at this point in our work friendship. She watched me as I was falling apart two years ago, and while Cam picked up the pieces. Gina was also the one that had the pleasure of hearing me scream at him over the phone multiple times after catching him going behind my back with other girls.
"Same as always cheating and lying, I'm done this time."
She stands up to hug me and walks into the back. Gina's in her mid forties and has the most stable relationship and family life I've ever seen, she is the end game goal.
As I collect my bag to leave Cams silver Honda rolls up outside. I sigh heavily and Gina wishes me good luck hugging telling me if I need a little extra lunch break I can take my time getting back.

I say nothing as I get into Cam's car, inhaling the familiar air freshener smell mixed with his body spray. We only drive about a block away for lunch. We could have easily walked, but I get the feeling I'll be walking back to work alone after this. He leads me to a booth in the front of the sandwich shop. After ordering in almost silence I finally find the words to tell him what I need to say.
"Listen, I'll always be grateful for you Cam. You saved me from a place I never want to go back to, but we can't do this anymore. I finally feel like I've got my life back and every time something happens with us I back track again. The fighting, the stress, I've been done with it for a while now. I'm done wasting our time with this mess."
"You know I love you Jace, I don't think I'll ever care about anyone," I cut him off before he can spill out anymore garbage.
"No, don't start that shit. You started pulling away as soon as I was back on my feet because you knew it would upset me again." I flag down the waitress to ask for a take away container. "I won't sit here and let you make me feel bad for finally putting my big girl pants on and being ready to take care of myself."
I toss some money on the table and walk out the door.
"At least let me drive you back to work. It's starting to rain."
"No Cam I'll be fine," I half turn towards him, his eyes are full of regret I shake my head, "alright. Take me back to work."
The car creeps down the road at a snails pace.
"I'm sorry Jace. For everything. I thought that things would stay perfect between us forever, but once you got your life together, I knew it was over. That's why I started fooling around with girls, you deserve better." He pulls into the parking lot at my work running his hand over his face to try to hide the tears. "I hope things stay good for you Jace. If you need me you know where to find me."
Despite all the pain and stress he's caused me, I really will always appreciate that he saved me. I lean over the center console and kiss his cheek, pulling him against me for a hug.
"Goodbye Cam."
I wait for him to pull away before I go inside. Thoughts of Matty sneak into my head wondering what he would think if he knew I spent so long thinking that I needed Cam to keep myself from falling apart. My body is soaked from standing in the rain for two minutes but, Gina is standing right at the door with a towel when I walk in. She wraps my shoulders in it and wipes the tears off my face. It doesn't take me long to recover from the whole ordeal, and when I do she's right there to listen, telling me how strong I am.
The rest of the day I try to push the weekend out of my head entirely. Matty is great but if I fall right into a new relationship I don't know if I'll be able to put my whole heart into it. Then again Matty doesn't exactly seem like he's ready to put his heart into anything either, maybe we could work for each other. The overnight staff come in momentarily distracting me from my own chaos, and I pack up walking out the door with Gina.
"Next Thursday come to dinner at my house, Chris is doing homemade pizza night. I know you love his cooking, and the kids miss you."
I agree to go, of course. Smiling and waving at her as she drives off. When I get in my car I respond to Matty's text from earlier.

Last night was fun we'll have to see each other again sometime;)-Jace

The next message I send is to Caroline asking what she wants for dinner, offering to buy wine if she brings food. Caroline agrees telling me she'll grab food and meet at mine in an hour. Giving me plenty of time to get home and change. Not before Matty texts me again.

How about tonight love I'm free if you are-Matty