FHS-Four

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                                  •FAINA•
      Is he kidding me? Hearing Dixie's name makes me want to punch and kick people in the face and in the balls. The fall of our relationship was partially because of her, him and me. I was branded as the 'Cheater' in the relationship due to some bullshit Dixie pulled on me.

The first time I screwed up with a guy who attracted me in some kind of way, Carl and I talked about it and we let it go. He was furious and we took a break from our relationship for a month and few weeks. Carl used to do the same with Dixie and he claimed he stopped but I still saw him chat with her a number of times and he will go like "It's just a chat Holly."

   I felt our relationship go to the bottom ever since he met Dixie. I got depressed, frustrated and so lonely at times and he still went ahead with her. I knew letting a different guy have a taste of me was really stupid but I still do wonder why I didn't feel bad about it. Maybe it was because Carl used to screw up too. I did a lot of dirty things with this guy and Carl being the nosy guy he is, found out.

   The second time with him wasn't my fault. I went to a party with my friends and he was there too. We shared the liquor he offered to me and the next thing I knew, I was up and naked and bruised in my peach hole with him. There was less time to think about how it all happened because Carl bumped into us with Dixie. I saw her wink at this guy and she smiled at me.

Carl waited for me to dress up and looking for my clothes took forever. My head ached and my whole body was hurting like I went into a fight the night before. I dressed up when I found my clothes and Carl pulled me out of the room like a tied goat. It was so embarrassing and I wasn't speaking when he took me to my apartment. Dixie dared not follow us because I would've really spilt her head open for whatever she had planned with him.

      "You've still been seeing him?" he asked and I shook my head. His fist went hard in the wall and I was so scared yet so hungry and tired. "Then how the fuck did he fuck you again in his room Holly!" he asked angrily and my stomach rumbled.

Too much alcohol. I saw his hand bleed and it dropped on the floor. I took my head up and looked down again. His scowl was making my body itch. "Faina! How did you end up in his bed again?" his voice was getting much angrier and I couldn't think of anything to say to him. I drew back from him should in case, he gets much angrier than he already was and hits me on the face. He took a step forward and held me by the blouse I wore which smelled like it was dipped in alcohol. He was choking me with the dress and it was getting hard to breathe.

      "Becker..." I let a word out and tears started falling down on my cheeks.

      "You've been lying to me and you let him get his hands on you again." his eyes were full of anger and hurt and it was making me dizzy. "I really thought you changed!"

      "I don't know how I... ended up there."

      "Do you remember drinking with him at the party? Do you remember reminiscing about how good he was!" he yelled. He still held my blouse and yelled at my face.

I remember those two things but I do not remember letting him take me to his house. I clearly remember putting my head on the high table when I got tipsy but not the part where he had to bruise my peach hole. "Holly what has gotten into you? Why do you keep repeating something we've been fighting about?"

       "Carl, I swear I didn't go home willingly with him. I don't know how I ended up there." I wiped my tears and he let go off me.

       "So you're trying to tell me he took a full grown woman home without her consent and what, raped her?" I nodded. "Dixie was right about you."

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