Notes

061: pain

A hot fire erupted from Irene's chest, spreading like an epidemic throughout her body. Black dotted her vision as she limply hit the floor. A cry shot through her haze of pain, but she couldn't decipher exactly what they had said.

Fighting the blanket of unconsciousness that threatened to grab her, she couldn't help but fall into the softness of nothing.

A small light erupted in front of her, making her flinch. Nonetheless, she followed it, wondering exactly what had ended her up here in this strange place. As she entered through the lit door, she felt her knees go weak.

He was here.

Her heart began to palpitate.

"Hobi?" She choked out, stumbling in his direction. The man made a startled one eighty, his eyes meeting the figure of his love.

Sadness invaded his eyes as he took in her features, "Baby? What are you..?" His voice sounded pained.

"You're here. You're really here. Is this some cruel joke?" She sobbed, struggling to stand once again. He was exactly as she remembered him.

"No, no baby. I'm here." He replied softly, bringing her into his arms.

"What's happening Hobi? Why can I see you?"

"Irene, I think... did you die?." He replied softly, breathing out.

"Did I..?" She trailed off, her precious memories evading her.

"I don't know, but you shouldn't be here. It's too early." Hoseok said sadly.

"Maybe, but you shouldn't either Hobi. I still love you. I miss you so much. I miss your smile, your laugh, the way you'd run your hands over my sides to comfort me and the endless memories. I remember every date you took me on, I remember the dances you'd dedicate to me. It hurts so much to live without you. It hurts every time I'm reminded of you, because I can't have you. And what hurts the most is knowing that it's my fault." She let out everything she'd been holding captive in her broken heart. Everything spilt from her trembling lips as she clung to her first love tightly.

"Irene, this isn't your fault baby. I know it hurts. I've missed you more than you know, but it was my fate. I was meant to save you, to be there in that moment, because you still hadn't fulfilled you purpose."

"I don't have a purpose without you."

"You do." Another voice chimed softly.

Her head shot up. "Joonie?!" She cried, moving to wrap him tightly within her embrace.

"Hey Ire." He let out a light chuckle, "I'm glad I could be of service, even after I was gone."

Her eyes brows furrowed before she understood what he was implying. "Jin misses you." She let out, her mouth speaking without her consent.

He didn't seem fazed by it, only responding with, "And I miss him. Is he okay?"

"He's okay. I sent him to Seoul, where he's safe." I nodded, sending him a reassuring smile.

"I'm glad. I hope he's able to move on and find happiness with someone else. He deserves the world after everything that's happened." Namjoon said gently, eyes going muted with the thought.

"I'm sure he'll find someone." I simpered.

"But as for you, Ire, you need to go back." He stated. Hoseok's eyes softened. He realized before Irene herself did.

"Why? There's no one to go back for." She sighed.

"Perhaps this will change your mind." Joon said, waving his hand in a graceful swing. A vision appeared before me.

A man with blonde hair sat sobbing next to a girl's body. His bruised frame shook with each pain filled sound he let out, his beautiful brown eyes leaking tears. His soft face was contorted into a helpless stare, trying desperately to do something for her. Anything.

Standing behind him was another man, more muscular with silver locks of hair, his right arm limp, still clutching a gun. He seemed to be ordering people around.

"Who is that?"

"That's you Irene. You, Yoongi, and Jimin. You got shot." Namjoon deadpanned, a piteous glance shot my way, as though he hadn't died too.

"Wait... Yoongi!" His name slipped from her lips, her hand reaching out to touch the image, only to have it ripple under her touch.

"He needs you Irene. He needs you now more than ever." Namjoon explained quietly.

"But what about—"

"Irene, face it. I'm dead. Hoseok is dead, and you need to move on. Yoongi is there, waiting for you."

She sent a wary glance to her ex, only to see him give her a firm nod. "Aren't I dead too? What if I want to stay here with you guys?"

"We just weren't made to last. Not everyone is given a chance to go back. You need to move on. You have to move on for the sake of others in your life. I will always care for you, and somehow, I'll watch over you. You'll make me so damn proud baby; I know you will." He said, running his hands up and down her sides, just like she'd mentioned.

"Yoongi loves you too. And at the least, you care about him. You were willing enough to take a bullet for him. Clearly, there's something." Another logical answer came from Namjoon.

"I do, but I don't want to leave you. Not again." She whimpered.

"We'll always be there in spirit Ire. If no one else, then do this for me. I just wanna see you happy." Hoseok cooed softly, putting a finger under a chin. As she met his eyes, she could feel the dulled ache in her heart.

Her lips pursed, holding back more salty tears. "You aren't mad that I've tried moving on?"

"I'll never be. You deserve happiness baby. Even if it's not with me."

Thoughts mulled through her head before her mind was made, "Okay. I'll go back. But just promise me one thing."

"Of course Re."

"Be there. Please."

"I wouldn't dare be anywhere else." He whispered, giving her one last kiss.

"I love you."