Divergence: Choices

Chapter 6

I walk as quickly as possible to put some distance between Eric and I's conversation. When I arrive at the cafeteria I take a seat next to Zeke who is squabbling with other members as well as Shauna on the rankings that will be posted for Phase II.

"Four, please tell me my ding ass brother is not going to rank higher than me!" I just shake my head at Zeke, although he ranked fourth in our class, I know for fact Uriah is Divergent. It will come down to him and Tris to be placed first and second.

"No comment." I say sternly not giving away my thoughts.

"He doesn't need to comment, Lynn is going to be placed first anyways." Shauna declares. I can't help but smirk at the fact that both Zeke and Shauna's siblings are competing against each other.

"I'm not so sure about that." Lauren butts in, I know she wouldn't ever tell true rankings but hearing and instructor talk about it only fuels the fire. I can't help but laugh a bit.

After we're done eating, Lauren suggest we go to the training room. It is one of our places for refuge. Zeke offers to spar with me but I just shake my head, after my conversation with Eric I would be afraid to go too far.

As we approach the training room we hear people laughing and carrying on. I shove the door open and see Uriah, Lynn, Marlene, and Tris. My stomach flips at the sight of her but I try to play it cool.

"I thought I heard something in here" I say scanning the room trying to keep from staring at Tris. I know she is worried about her Divergence being discovered. Over and over I have failed to provide her that same comfort Amar did me through my training.

"Turns out it's my idiot brother. You're not supposed to be in here after hours. Careful, or Four will tell Eric and you'll be as good as scalped." Uriah gives Zeke a face as he shoves a pellet gun down the back of his pant.

Glancing around the room I can only imagine our intrusion saved someone from doing something Dauntless and stupid. They all start to file out due to our presence, Tris looking hesitant if we are actually mad that they're in here.

"You wouldn't tell Eric" Lynn declares as she walks past me through the door I'm holding open for them.

"No, I wouldn't" I respond to her. Even if they were doing something terrible I wouldn't tell Eric. The Dauntless born's know we hate each other, I am sure the transfers have figured it out as well on their short time here.

I watch carefully as they all leave, I hold the door to usher them out. As Tris leaves last I place my hand on her back acting as though I'm leading her out. "Wait a second" I whisper waiting for the others to get far enough away.

Tris looks as me nervously and concerned. I try to give her a smile but my fears from today stop it half way. "You belong here, you know that? You belong with us. It'll be over soon, so just hang on, okay?"

I instantly feel embarrassed by what I said. I nervously rub the back of my neck that is suddenly unbearably hot. I look anywhere but at Tris, not knowing what to do. I suddenly feel her hand on mine, our fingers intertwine as though they've waited a lifetime to meet.

I stop breathing, afraid to interrupt this moment. Tris looks at me, and I look at her. No words are spoken. I allow my index finger to stroke the inside of her palm gently. She shyly smiles at me and I return the gesture. My breathing has turned heavy, I've never touched anyone this way before, and I am sure she hasn't either the way we both nervously stand there grasping each other's hand.

Too soon she loosens her grip, I pull her closer to me just before she lets go. For a second she looks shocked, honestly I am shocked by my actions too. I nervously wipe my feet on the floor below, keeping my eyes down.

I gaze back up to her, she is watching me intently to see what I will do next. "Tris." I whisper as I swallow hard. What I want to do and what I have the nerve to do are two different things in this moment. I clear my throat for a second. "You should catch back up with your friends, before they come back after you."

She offers a smile and nods in agreement. I watch her walk away, her head turning back over her shoulder to steal one last glance. I blush fiercely at her before looking away again. I smile realizing that after all the excuses I've came up with to touch her, this is the first time she has ever touched me, the only reason being because she wanted to.

"You just going to stand their with that goofy ass smile all night?" I look up to see that Zeke was observing our interaction the whole time. I try to put my instructor mask back on but it doesn't work, I am too happy in this moment.

"I don't know what you're talking about." I mumble as I begin taping my hands.

"So I didn't just witness you and Tris awkwardly holding hands?" I look over to see him raising his eyebrows at me.

"Shut up." I roll my eyes at him.

"Hey, I'm just saying, that girl obviously returns your feelings. You should go for it, there are only a few more weeks left in initiation. At least let her know you're interested."

"Isn't that what I just did?"

"Um no. Personally, I would have kissed her, showed her all the passion a night with me could bring." He smirks at me. I know he is half teasing because she is Abnegation. But he is right, I want to kiss her.

"I don't think a sixteen year old Abnegation girl is interested in what passion you have to bring." I snap at him. He just laughs at me and shrugs.

"Can't be a Stiff your whole life Four, at some point you've got to let that Dauntless side out. And Dauntless Four would have made a move."

I can't help but let out a laugh. Zeke positions himself behind the punching bag, holding it steady as I work my body.

As I observe my friend I take a moment to realize how much I've kept from him. I have been investigating a war on my own, sneaking around and keeping secrets. I know Zeke is trustworthy, a true friend who has been there from day one. Perhaps it's time I reveal it all.