Bright

Chapter 30

With both my wrist still in his grasp, I nod to him, wide-eyed and a little caught off guard. "O-okay." I agree with him. To be honest, I don't think I could do it anyway. The thought of ever performing oral sex again makes my stomach churn. 

Letting go of my wrist, Harry removes my panties, leaving both of us in the nude. I crawl up onto our bed and lay down as Harry follows, crawling over me. I spread my legs so he could lie between them comfortably and once he is where he wanted to be, he gently lays down so he didn't crush me. Being skin-to-skin with him again is like our first time all over again. 

I have to re-learn what Harry feels like. I let my hands roam his entire body and as I committed it to memory, Harry began to take charge. He gently clasps my chin between his thumb and finger before drawing my lips up to his for a heated kiss. His lips are soft as they move over mine and the second his tongue swipes against my bottom lip, I give him entrance. The coolness of his lip ring and the heat of his lips makes for an incredible contrast. 

Our tongues wrestle for dominance for a little bit, then they spent more time exploring each other's mouth before Harry takes over again. Our kisses grow heated and Harry pulls away to trail kisses down my jaw and neck, over my collarbones and on my chest. As he peppers his way back up to my sweet spot behind my ear, I grasp his biceps as a moan leaves my lips and I arch my back to press my hips into his. 

I feel his smile before I see it. He runs his nose along my jaw before smiling at me and kissing my lips again. "Fuck, I've missed you. I've missed this." He murmurs against my ear, his hot breath tickles the shell of my ear before I feel his teeth tug at my earlobe. 

"Me, too. Thank you. For everything. For still loving me even though I wasn't sure I could do this. I love you." I whisper, my voice thick as it cracks. My eyes well up with tears and I try not to cry because I don't want to ruin the moment. We've both waited for this for a long time. 

Cupping my cheek, Harry uses the pad of his thumb to brush my tears away and he presses several sweet kisses to my lips. "Listen to me. You crash landed into my world and completely wrecked it in the best way. I wasn't sure I was capable of loving another human until you came along. You make me a better man. I'm rough around the edges still and there's a lot to learn, but you don't have to thank me for anything. Do you honestly think that anything on this planet could make me fall out of love with you? It would have to fucking kill me first." It's quiet for a second as he grabs my left hand and brings our hands together, our fingers intertwined and he continues. "When I put this ring on your finger and said my vows, it wasn't temporary, baby. I meant for life. What happened to you is my fault and don't think for a second that I don't live with that guilt every single day. But you and I? We are for life. I don't care if we never have sex again or any of that. I just want you and our son and our family. I love you." He says. 

His words of course make me cry harder and I nod to him. Jesus, has he been blaming himself for this the entire time? How did I miss that? I need to reassure him that this was out of our control. "Oh, Harry, no. It wasn't your fault either. I don't blame you. He was a psycho long before either of us came into the picture. We just made for easy targets and maybe if I knew how to defend myself, I could have fought him." I whisper to him. I look into his eyes to see if he is understanding what I'm saying. "Please, please, don't blame yourself for this. I know that you love me and I knew you'd do your best to save me. You did, or I wouldn't be here right now. What happened to me was out of our control."

Harry purses his lips together and I can see the pain in his eyes. "Don't you dare blame yourself either. You were the victim in this scenario. You did what you had to do to keep yourself and our baby alive. Don't you ever fucking apologize for that. Clear?" He asks. I immediately nod. I'm not sure he will ever let this go. I know this took a toll on both of us, but we are fighters. My life since I've been with Harry has been the best it's ever been. I am so much stronger than the broken girl he picked up in Arizona.