Feelings Fade [Sequel to Losing Control]

T H I R T E E N

"Star-crossed lovers"

Winter
It's been a couple of days and I decided to go talk to Dallas. I looked at Texas, Lynn, and Lannan who were sleeping next to me. I smiled lightly and kissed Lynn and Texas. I was about to get up when Lannan woke up.

"Hey," I said and he nodded.

"Hey"

"I'm gonna go talk with Dallas, can you watch them?"

"Are you gonna get back with him?"

"I don't know" I shrugged and he nodded.

I went into my closet looking for an outfit. Finally, I picked out a black dress with a small cut out in the front and I saw my blue leather jacket in the back of my closet. It was the one Dallas gave me for my birthday. I put it on and walked out. I curled my hair and left my face alone.

I looked over and saw Lynn and Texas looking at me. I smiled.

"Morning loves" I smiled and they smiled back. How much Texas looked like Dallas killed me.

"Mommy, where Are you going?"

"To a grown-up place"

"Are you leaving us? Brandon told me his mommy left him"

I frowned and walked over kissing his head.

"Never, mommy needs to talk to an old friend"

"Is it dad? Well, my dad?" Lynn asked and I nodded.

She smiled and hugged me. I said my goodbyes and walked out of the house.

Dallas
I was sitting at the piano messing with it. Winter loved the piano and I guess taught Lynn cause I saw her playing one day when she came to visit. She kinda taught me and well now...I know how to play.

"I should've told you how I really feel I little in advance" I started to sing. It was something I did when it was just me and Buck. Or me.

"Then I would've had some time to go and work it out I think I've lost my chance"

I heard the door open but kept playing.

"For the last three years, I just hid it so well hoping that you'd figure it out because I never could tell it straight to your face"

I kept playing letting out everything. Everything.

Winter
When I walked in I heard him playing and singing again. I stood by the doorway and listened.

"Never have I ever woken up in a cold hard sweat from a dream wondering If you'd ever say "goodbye" If I didn't say it first"

I don't think I would've said goodbye if he didn't do what he did. I really did love him. I loved him a lot.

"I'm done playing these games I can't believe what I'm about to say I won't tell you goodbye with my love left behind kiss me before I fucking lose my mind"

I walked closer and Buck saw me sending me a small smile as if saying 'hello' I nodded back.

"No, no more nights. Drink until my loneliness up till two A.M"

That hurt hearing that. He's now a drunk cause of me...

"No, no more waiting. Pacing 'round the bar hoping that you might walk in"

I smiled. I'm here Dallas. I'm here.

"For the last three years, I just hid it so well hoping that you'd figure it out because I never could tell it straight to your face"

Did he still love me?

"Never have I ever woken up in a cold hard sweat from a dream wondering If you'd ever say "goodbye" If I didn't say it first"

"I'm done playing these games I can't believe what I'm about to say No, I won't tell you goodbye with my love left behind kiss me before I fucking lose my mind"

I smiled and walked over to him quickly I was about to jump on him and kiss him when he started singing again.

"I'm done playing these games I can't believe what I'm about to say. Cause I would rather die than feeling this inside tricks played on my mind. No, I would rather die than just tell you goodbye with my love left behind kiss me before I fucking lose my mind"

He finished and I walked over straddling his lap. I kissed him gently and he didn't...that broke my heart.

Slowly I got off him and walked away and out of Bucks. The song wasn't for me...

Dallas
She kissed me. Winter kissed me but I had to force myself not to kiss back. I couldn't. She didn't need me. She deserved better. She can get better. Not some addicted drunk...Lynn can get better. A better father who will love her more than she knows. I miss them. I miss them so so so damn much, but then I realized...Winter was wearing a blue leather jacket...the one I gave her 5 years ago...on her 18th birthday. (hopefully I did the math right)