MISMATCH

Chapter 27 - Matteo: Torn Up

Losing her was the biggest mistake I ever made.

Losing my son made it even harder.

And now I don't know what to do anymore.

***

When I finally told Frances the truth about being a father, I deliberately didn't tell her that Nicole was the mother of my unborn baby. That idea wouldn't set well with her considering the fact that she hated Nicole. I would never forget the look on her face when she found out that I got someone pregnant. As expected, she requested for space - time to think things through. And so we decided to not see each other for a while until she came up with a decision. We didn't talk for two weeks - and at the same time, I decided to talk to my mother about my situation.

Of course she was upset - who could blame her? I messed up big time and that meant she might not even be able to see her grandchild. My sisters were disappointed in me as well since they were expecting to finally meet Nicole. "I didn't raise you to become like your father, Teo." And no matter how I tried to explain myself, she said she wouldn't understand what I did. Neither did my sisters.

I had disappointed so many people in my life that I didn't know what to do anymore. Even Wacks who had always taken my side, hated my guts. But from him I did learn about how Nicole was doing. He had been resourceful and added her on FB, he told me. And from there I found out that Nicole would be having her baby shower at Funky Brewster to which he had been invited to. I did drive by just to see how she was, and I did not like what I saw. It looked like Tony was back in her life again.

I later received a call from Wacks after the baby shower. He wanted to meet me and said that he had something to important to tell me. We ended up meeting at his place. When I got there, he handed me a small envelope. "She wanted you to have that."

I opened the envelope and what I saw inside made my heart ache all the more.

It was the picture of her ultrasound - the appointment I failed to attend with her. On it was a post-it that said the baby was a boy.

"Thanks, Wacks."

"His name is Matthew Nikolai."

Finding out the baby's name made me feel even worse. I clutched the photo tightly - it may be the last I'd be able to see of my son anyway.

"She's due in a few weeks, dude. What do you plan to do?"

I shrugged. "I don't know. I don't have the balls to face her anymore."

"Yeah you did mess her life up."

"Do me a favor, dude. Could you let me know when she gives birth? I have to be there. I promised her."

Wacks sighed. "I'll see what I can do."

***

A few days later Frances finally contacted me. It had been a tearful reunion. She said she forgave me and this time, would make sure that she never neglected me again. She blamed herself for what happened - and I guess from what she told me, she figured out it was Nicole whom I'd gotten pregnant. She told me about her argument about Tony and at first she couldn't believe what she found out. So she did some thinking and decided that it was time for her to make a stand for the first time. "I've been so unfair to you, Matteo. You never deserved how I treated you." She hugged me tightly and I could tell she was about to cry again. "I'll never leave you, Matteo. This time, I choose you."

I didn't know what to say. I was still so confused. So I showed her the picture of the ultrasound. "I promised to be there when Nicole gave birth. I guess I can't do that now."