Chapter 11

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I had my mom pick us up as soon as the game ended. I didn't want to say it out loud while my mom was in the car so I texted them about what happened.

Stasia told me that I should talk to Ryan at least. Issac said to me that if Ryan's on the market to lead him to him.

I told Issac to fuck off and we all laughed and then my mom dropped him off. Stasis told me not to worry and that it was going to get better.

"How was the game?" my mom asks, and I don't know how to answer her.

"It was good I saw some old friends," I say as she parks the car.

I walk into my room and lay on my bed. The mattress had lost its comfort that it used to bring me.

As I walk into my bathroom and turn on my shower, I feel so sad. Ryan was never going to talk to me again.

He made me smile and laugh there had to be something I could do or say.

I then decided after an hour of thinking and watching some makeup tutorials. To just text him and explain to him why I ran off.

I told him how it was my first kiss and I was nervous. He said to me to FaceTime him, and I began to panic, so I told him to wait 10 minutes.

I put on a little mascara and put my hair down and then called him. He was wearing a Spider-Man T-shirt.

"He's so cute," I say, and he laughs.

"Yeah I know I'm cute."

"I was talking about Tom Holland," I say, and he gasps.

"That's true he's so hot I'd fuck him, oh Tom fuck me daddy" he jokes, and I'm dying of laughter.

We continue to talk for the new two hours until I tell him that I had plans and needed to get sleep. He whined and told me that the next time if I'm free that we should "hangout."

I had a dream that it was another party and something terrible happened.

But then I woke up and almost panicked my always locked room door was open.

This couldn't be happening someone must've broken into my house. I run out of my room, and everything is in place.

"Dad!" I yelled at my father who was eating the breakfast my mom made before heading to work.

"Josephine, what's wrong are you okay?" He asks, and I begin to tell him about my door. He tells me it must've been the wind or I forgot to lock it.

I walk back to my room, and when I look at the lock, I begin to feel nothing.

My lungs weren't working anymore, and I couldn't breathe.

I was having a panic attack and this time wasn't good. I couldn't see and so when I tried to get to my bed. I hit the floor instead.

I then laid on the floor clutching my carpet. When the feeling passed over, I began to cry.

Remembering my plans with Davina, I cleaned myself up. Took a shower and got ready.

Her mom pulled up, and I said goodbye to my dad, and then Davina opened my car door.

We sat in the back seat talking about our plans we were going to the mall then we were going to Lena's birthday. The football team we going to let her play with them and let her win.

I decided only to invite Davina cause she was sweet and told me her grandpa had down syndrome.

"If you girls need anything I'm a phone call or text away I'm going to do some shopping of my own here's my card," she says handing Davina a credit card.

We have her take our pictures and then she goes into a different store.

"Oh shit," I say, and Davina looks in my direction.

"Here we go again," I say and walk towards him.


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