raising hope | s.m

♡Sixteen♡

(THIS CHAPTER DOES HAVE MATURE ELEMENTS IN IT. IF YOU ARE YOUNG OR MAY GET TRIGGERED PLEASE SKIP THIS CHAPTER!)

Maya

Now that I'm out of the hospital, Shawn is holding me a bit closer. His arms are tighter around me when he hugs me. It doesn't bother me. In fact, I never want him to stop.

It's moments like this when I wish he was here. He went to the gym to practice for his fight. He said it'd only be for an hour. If anything it was me who made him go. I just need time to clear my head.

It's times like these when I wish he wouldn't listen to me. When you're alone, your thoughts have the room to consume you piece by piece. Images of Jake on top of me flash in my head as I try to sleep.

"It's okay, baby, you're in good hands. Tell Mendes this is how you treat a woman." His words echo in my head. Panic surges through my veins. But my eyes won't open. He walks behind me and grabs two bandannas. One he puts in my mouth and tied behind my head. The other goes over my eyes.

My breath picks up and my chest feels as if a metal bar is being wrapped around me. Crushing me into nothingness. Jake's hands are on my thighs and I flinch. He laughs. He pulls them apart and I fight against him. Not that it does much. My hands are bound behind my back. My cries only make him keep going.

"No!" I scream. My body shoots up in the bed. My hand over my heart, I breathe heavily. Seconds later, Shawn rushes into the room. His eyes hold worry as he searches frantically for the problem. His eyes finally land on me. A think coat of sweat covers my arms, neck, and head. He walks over and wraps his arms around me.

"What happened?" he asks, softly. His voice alone calms me down some.

"H-he h-hurt me, Shawn," I cry. His arms are tight around me. His breath fans the top of my head.

"Breathe, Mama, breathe," he coos. He turns on the light on the bedside table. The light illuminates his face with an off-white tone. He still looks good though. He rests his chin on my head. "Are you ready to tell me what happened?"

Taking a deep breath, I look up at him. His eyes scan my face.

"When you left the room I texted Katie to see how Hope was doing. He came in and covered my mouth. He said 'Shawn was right you do look good in red.' I kicked him off and tried to leave but..." my voice trails off and Shawn pulls me closer to him.

"It's okay, Mama. You're safe." I take another deep breath. His scent filling my lungs. Intoxicating but makes me feel safe.

"He grabbed my hair and pulled me back down. He kicked me and took my shirt off," I whisper. He tenses before kissing my head. "He complimented me and took me to his room. Then... he took my pants off and grabbed two bandannas and rope. He tied my hands behind my back and put one of the bandannas in my mouth.

He told me 'it's always more fun when the girl doesn't know what's going on.' He took the other bandanna and put it around my eyes. H-he grabbed my legs and..." a cry interrupts me. He pulls me fully onto his lap and lays my head on his shoulder.

"You don't have to continue," he remarks softly.

"No, it's fine. He took off my pants and..." I breathe in and out. Shawn kisses my cheek and runs his hand up and down my arm. "He talked about how it was fun seeing me not know what he was going to do. He ranted about how this was my fault and I should have never kissed you or talked to you."

"You don't believe that do you?" he questions. My hands play with his fingers and he stares down at them.

"I don't know what to believe anymore." He places his finger under my chin and makes me look up at him.

"Believe me when I say that none of this was your fault. You are the most hardworking woman I've ever met and you deserve nothing less of the world." My lips meet his. His hands move to my hips and I move to my knees. He breaks the kiss and rests his forehead against mine.

"He ran his hand up my leg and without warning, not that there would have been one, he started. He called me names and put his hand on my neck. The last thing I remember was him groaning and me crying. He raped me, Shawn." I cry. He pulls me close and I bury my head in the crook of his neck. As he rubs his hand up and down my back, I feel myself relaxing.

"Do you remember anything after that?" he mumbles into my hair.

"No. I woke up in the hospital and Noah and a doctor was there. When I didn't see you I thought something happened, I thought he got to you and everything became real. Everything started hurting. It scared me, Shawn. I had never been so scared in my life."

"I'm right here, honey. I'm not going anywhere anytime soon." 

"I know, muffin man, I know." He chuckles at the nickname. "We should go back to that cafe. I liked it there."

"Maybe we will tomorrow. We can take Hope if you want." I nod into his chest. My body is too tired to do anything else. Shawn places his arm behind my back and under my legs. Looking up at him, he smiles down at me.

"Can I sleep in your room tonight?" I whisper. He chuckles lightly before nodding.

"What about Hope?"

"She can come with." He chuckles and carries me to his room. He lays me on his bed and I realize how much softer it is then the bed I was on. Sure, that one was soft but this one is broken in. He kisses my forehead before leaving the room for a moment. A chill fills me but is gone when the other side of the bed dips. Turning over, I see him laying Hope down next to me. "You're back."

"Yeah, I told you I'd come back." He lays on the other side of Hope and wraps his arm around us both. Hope subconsciously snuggles closer to him and I do too. Before I'm fully asleep I hear him mumble two words that send the butterflies in my stomach ablaze.

"My girls."