N I N E T E E N

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We sat on his bed, Daniel sitting away from me, which made me anxious. ''Why are you apologizing? You know you can talk to me, no matter what.'' I reached out for his hand. ''I'm here for you.'' He tried to smile, which he gave up shortly afterward. ''I did something in Korea.'' I had to chuckle. ''I know.'' He looked at me, confused. ''What?'' I turned to face him better. ''You had too much to drink. Tyler told me that..'' Daniel interrupted me. ''No. Well yes. But that's not why I'm apologizing.'' And there it was again, the weird feeling in my stomach. ''I met a girl that night. I was drunk. Really drunk. We got some food and..'' I stopped him. ''So that night in Korea when you send me a picture of your food..'' He nodded. ''I was with someone else.'' You could hear the regret in his voice. 

I knew he regretted it. ''And?'' I knew where this was going, but I needed to hear it coming out of his mouth with his own words. ''She took me back to her place and.. Well, you know.'' He looked down at his hands, playing with his fingers. ''Say it, Daniel.'' Not knowing where I took this strength from, I looked him dead in the eyes. ''I had sex with her.'' I stood up, looking down at him. ''Ok.'' It took every bit in me, not to burst into tears in front of him. I started walking towards the door, reaching out for the handle before turning around one last time, looking at the boy I was falling in love with. ''Did you ever think of me whilst being with her?'' A tear slowly dropped from my eye on the floor. Daniel looked up with tearshot eyes. ''All the time.'' I couldn't hold it back and started to laugh, whilst tears rolled down my face. ''And you never thought about stopping? Calling me? You needed a shag so badly, you couldn't have called to ask if I'd come some days earlier.'' 

I felt the anger boiling in me, ready to burst out. But knowing myself and how this could turn out, I opened the door, slamming it shut and started walking towards the elevator. The door next to Daniels opened up, Jack looking out. ''Y/n?'' I looked at him, salty lips, wet cheeks. ''What the hell happened?'' I looked behind myself to see Daniel looking out his room. ''Ask him.'' I continued my walk to the elevator, feeling my legs give in. Jack quickly wrapped his arms aroud me, holding me up. I never felt that kind of pain. I've had shit happen to me in my life. But after everything that Daniel showed me and helped me trough, I wasn't prepared to be hurt by him. ''A little help, Daniel!?'' Jack screamed at him. I laid in Jacks arms, leaning against him for support. Daniel quickly walked up to us, reaching out for me to help. ''Don't you dare fucking touching me.'' I snapped. Jacks eyes grew. ''What the hell happened?'' Daniel slid down the wall across me, his head in his hands. ''Don't you dare cry.'' I pushed myself off Jack and stood in front of Daniel who was looking up to me. ''You don't get to cry. You had a choice. To cheat or not. And you made your decision.'' I could hear Jack sharply breathing in trough his nose. 

Daniel kept looking at me. We made eye contact, before I stepped away from him, walking to the elevator. I didn't turn around. Pressing the button for the lobby. ''Bye, Jack.'' The door closed and it started moving. I wished for the way down to be as long as it felt on the way up. Not ready to face Chris and Tyler.

The door opened up and I walked towards the small group. The rest of the boys stood with Chris. Corbyn having his arm around her waist. They were smiling, which broke me a little. ''Y/n!'' Chris got away from Corbyn and walked up to me. ''What happened, why are you crying, where's Daniel?'' I was bombarded with questions. ''I'm leaving.'' I looked at the boys, giving them a sad smile. ''I'll get my stuff from the studio. Here.'' I handed the house key to Jonah. ''Thank you for everything.'' He grabbed my shoulder, stopping me from leaving. ''Whatever Daniel did, don't let it interfere with your career. You have something good.'' I smiled thankfully. ''I have everything at my new flat. I won't be needing the key anymore. You guys enjoy the last few days.'' I gave each a short hug. 

''Y/n..'' His voice made me turn around again. Daniel stood in front of the elevator, Jack following close behind him. ''Don't leave.'' I laughed. ''You won't be needing me anymore.'' I saw Chris with tears in her eyes. ''Good luck with the album, boys. I'm proud of you.''

I took my bag from Tyler, who gave me an apologetic look, before letting go of the handle. ''Thank you, Ty.'' He nodded. ''No worries, Y/n.'' I turned around one last time. ''Goodbye.'' Everyone looked at me, either confused or with tears in their eyes. 

''Please, Y/n. I love you.'' 

I smiled at Daniel.

''I love you too.''

The door opened as I walked in front of it. Luckily, the car I came in earlier, still stood up front. ''Could you take me back to the airport, please?'' The driver looked behind me, at Tyler, who gave him a quick nod. The driver took my bag as I sat down in the backseat. ''Bye Chris.'' She followed after me, watching me get in the car, tears streaming down her face. ''Bye Y/n.'' I gave her a sad smile. The car started driving off, toward the airport. 


I booked the next flight back to Los Angeles. Checking in my bag and getting trough security. It was quiet. Mostly because no music was playing trough my headphones. I wore them to drown out every noise coming from the outside. 

Walking up to the gate, I decided to put an end the silence, playing some music. Harry Styles is was. Boarding started and I somehow managed to get trough it without thinking about what just happened. Sadly, the entire flight, my mind was going back to the moment, Daniel told me he cheated. I managed not to cry. Maybe because I was sitting next to an eltherly woman, or because I had no tears left. But I was glad. 

Arriving back in Los Angeles, I ordered an Uber, taking me to the Studio. I quickly walked up to the place I used to spend hours and hours in. Grabbing everything I left there, I took one last look at the booth I used to sing in. It was a way of escaping. But I realized how it reminded me of the boys. Watching them record their songs. Daniel and I sitting on one of the armchairs. His arms wrapped around me, pulling me closer. His breath on my neck. I smiled at the memories. 

I looked above the booth to see some pictures. And a cover of their single;

this is only the beginning.

And that it was. 

I closed the door behind me and walked downstairs, trought the door back to my Uber. ''You ready?'' I smiled. ''Thank you for waiting.'' He started driving to my flat. ''No worries. Seemed like you needed something good to happen.'' I laughed. ''Made my day.''

And so it did. I arrived home not much later and looked around the flat. Furniture still not build up. A mattress laying on the floor. The guitar daniel gave me laying on top of if. ''I guess this is it.''

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