Doctors Orders (Manxman)

Chapter 17

Tristan

The rest of the evening was terrible to say the least. The smallest of things annoyed me but instead of lashing out I swallowed my rage and kept quiet. My mood worsened as night came and there was still no word from Damien. I had lost count of how many times my family had asked me where he was. I simply shrugged because I had nothing to say. I had no idea where he was.

He hadn't seen my texts and his phone was unavailable. I was definitely mad at him for handling the situation like this but also a tad bit worried. My wording of the situation hadn't been the best.

I cringed when I remembered exactly what my words had been. I regretted adding the word twink at all. I could have just said that I saw him at the club but of course I had to go and mess it up. It had sounded like an accusation more than a revelation. It was almost as if I was accusing him of cheating. It wasn't as if we were lovers.

But you want to be don't you?

I shuddered. My feelings were a complicated mess right now. I couldn't deny that I was attracted to Damien but it wasn't that simple. I had thought of the guy as my big brother for so long and to suddenly kiss him would be weird. And of course if it didn't work out our friendship would also be destroyed.

I shook my head in frustration. Why was I even thinking these? Somehow my mind had already assumed that Damien would be ready to give up his juicy lifestyle for me and date me. Lol as if.

It was nearing dinner time and there was still no word from my dear friend. I had even called his mother but she said that he hadn't come home. That added to my worries and I sat down to dinner with a heavy mind. We said grace and started eating. Dinner was always a sombre affair in the Cooper household. Father didn't like talking while eating and we all respected his wish.

I was just on the verge of attacking the cheesy mashed potatoes when Dad spoke. I almost dropped the entire bowl. I could hear Beth choking on her own food while mother gasped. We all stared at the man at the head of the table in shock.

Melville Cooper was am intimidating man in both behaviour and appearance. He was tall with fierce eyes and a magnificent beard. I looked nothing like him with my pale complexion and curly hair. I was nothing like him in behaviour too. While he was an over achiever, I could only be described as mediocre. I never came first at anything nor did I ever take an interest in athletics like he had wanted me to. All in all my father and I didn't get along. My sexuality had been the last straw and I could barely remember the last time I had had a proper conversation with him.

"So son how is Chicago," he asked in a voice so deep it could put the Mariana Trench to shame. He fixed his intense eyes on me and I gulped. I carefully kept the bowl down and tried to find a suitable answer to his unexpected question.

" It's fine," I replied shakily. Then as an afterthought I added "Father". He seemed pleased at that, nodded and went back to his dinner. I sighed in relief and mentally applauded myself.

But my relief was short lived. It hadn't even been five minutes when he spoke again.

"How is Damien? You live with him don't you?"

The mention of his name didn't improve my already sour mood. I had a sudden urge to snap at my father for bringing him up but that would only lead to disaster. I already had enough troubles.

"Yes I do and he is good."

"Hmm." He went back to his dinner again but I knew that he wasn't finished. He had more to say.

"He is a doctor isn't he? A surgeon. I heard he is doing pretty well."

"Yes he is. He is very good at his job," I answered truthfully. I felt proud for some odd reason upon hearing my dad praise Damien. It was as if the praise had been directed at me too.

"Well son I think that you would do well to learn from him and his success. I think it's high time you became serious about your life."

The words were like shards of ice that pierced right through my chest. The food in my mouth suddenly tasted like ash and I found myself unable to swallow it. My eyes burned but not with tears. They burned with humiliation and shame. My mother had a horrified look on her face and Beth was openly glaring at father.

My father did not even spare them a glance. He was looking at me, I could feel his harsh cold stare on me. He was probably waiting for me to freak out and shout profanities at him. I did the exact opposite. In other words, I did nothing.

I simply picked up my spoon and resumed dinner like nothing had happened. I was not going to give my father the satisfaction of seeing me upset. He did not have that power over me anymore. If he didn't agree with my career choice then it was his own damn problem. Dinner after that was really a sombre affair. No one dared to speak or even chew loudly. The house was so quiet that I could hear insects chirping in the backyard.

I pushed back my chair noisily and stood up the moment I was finished. It was completely against the rule to get up from the table before everyone finished but I simply did not care anymore. I could see my father's jaw clench in anger but he did not say anything. Instead he stabbed a broccoli on his plate so hard that I  was sure that his plate had a crack. I just smiled brightly at him and walked away.

I was done with him and his words. I would not let them affect me anymore. But my resolution and strength slowly diminished as I got closer to my room. I could feel the tears gathering and I hurried.

As soon as I closed the door, they came. I sat down on the floor with my back to the door and cried my heart out. To say that your father's words meant nothing was easy but to implement it was a whole new case. However much I disliked my father, I couldn't pretend that his opinion did not matter to me. The man had created me for gods sake. Of course I wanted his approval and love. All I wanted was for my father to pat me on the back and say that he was proud of me. Was that really too much to ask?

And the worst part was that he was comparing me to Damien. I could never be Damien and I did not want to be Damien. We were two completely different people, opposites even and that was the secret to our friendship. We complemented each other. We fought and argued but resolved our issues. We weren't too similar or too different either. It hurt to think that my father preferred his sons best friend over him. He probably thought that Damien was this straight hotshot doctor who was unlucky enough to be friends with his gay useless son.

A few minutes later I could hear my mother's voice outside the door. She requested me to let her in. I didn't answer. She even apologised for her husband's behaviour. I still didn't answer. I felt horrible for putting my mother through this but I just wasn't ready to see her or hear her excuses. She gave up after a while and left with yet another apology.

Beth wisely made no attempts to talk to me. The room was fully dark. I didn't bother moving to the bed. It was surprisingly comfortable against the door.

I wasn't sure how long it was before I heard it. It could have been minutes or hours. There was small thud and something clinked against the window. Startled, I sat up and looked carefully at the window. There was another thud and I saw something small and black strike the window.

It was a pebble. Some idiot was throwing pebbles at my window. And I had a very good idea who it was.