the suicide hotline | ✔️

3.

i hear my phone ring on my desk, as i am woken still sitting in my chair from taking calls last night.

a text message lights my phone up and it reads 4:34am

'k.'

great. i unlock my phone and open my text

"Hi brad, it's kait. or mom whatever, me and your step dad decide to turn in the papers for you changing your last name, i guess you really didn't wanna be in the family. Since that's what you wanted in the first place. Good luck i guess."

my heart shatters reading the text and i can't help but cry, and i never cry... what's gotten into me.

i get the courage to type a message.

'that's never what i wanted in the first place i just wanted a family that treated me like their own. i'm blocking your number now, along with Jason, he's not my step dad."

i sniffle and realize how messy my life is for being 20 years old. which makes me break down more.

i remember the memories with my "family"

..."brad, open the damn door or it'll be worse for you!" my step dad, jason slurs on the other side of the door.

i'm leaving this place, i hate this house.

i remained quiet that night and packed while he banged on the door.

i stuffed all my savings into my bag, my phone , charger, as much clothes as i could, my toothbrush, toothpaste , comb, and other valuables. i opened my window, took one last look in my almost empty room and booked it.

that was almost 2 years ago, and i left on my own. i was nearly living in my car for half a year, until i saved up enough from my job and savings for an apartment, away from my hometown and moved to Seattle, Washington.

now i'm working for a suicide hotline on the side from my main job at a coffee shop.

i wipe my tears away thinking about that horrific time and my phone rings, the one i use for the hotline.

i take a deep breathe in and answer
"...hello this is the national suicide prevention hotline, I'm here to help. what's the matter?" i sniffle

it's quite on the other side until i hear a sniffle
"h-hi again." i hear a soft, familiar young woman's voice from the night before
......