Chapter Thirty

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The music played and the audience wept as my mother walked down the isle with my papa. He was beaming and both crying as he escorted my mother in her last wedding. My father was in the audience as well, and I could feel his eyes watching me with great caution. I was nervous, standing in the front of the crowd in my darling little dress and fancy hair and makeup. The priest was smiling at my mother and she looked confident. Blake sat at the alter, sweating and waiting for it to be over. He looked uncomfortable in his suit, and I knew that today had to be the day I made the right decisions. I looked over to Blake and then leaned in. 

"It's okay, relax! You can do this!"

"Here I was, thinking you didn't want me in your life."

"Everything happens for a reason." I said, "But things change too." He nodded and I leaned back into place. My mother reached the alter and the audience sat. I envied them, because of my heels. Cecilia was a person away from me, and I had to try not to look at her. Her makeup looked flawless and she looked like a Greek model in the green against her tan skin. Her hair was done up just right, and she was smiling. She caught me looking and I glanced away. My brother wouldn't look at me, and I felt sorry for myself. I looked away and back to my mother and Blake. They were holding each other and sobbing as the priest read the standard wedding garb. 

"I do." My mother said through her tears and Blake smiled at her. More confidence than before.

"I do." He said after a bit more of the rambling and the audience clapped.

"You may now kiss the bride!" The audience burst into tears and claps as my mother kissed Blake gently. She pulled back and they held hands as they ran down the isle. I smiled and followed the rest of the wedding party out to the car. We loaded it, and I watched as Cecilia sat next to Viper, and I sat wit Savannah. Tensions were thick enough to cut, and I pulled at the collar of my dress. When we reached the house, I ran into my room to put the after party dress on and take my hair down as instructed by my mother and the artists who had done it. The party dress was light, and sparkly. It was sheer white, and beautiful. I smiled in the mirror and headed down the stairs. My heels clicked against the tiles and I waited until the others surfaced in their party gear. Savannah came first, with the same smile. 

"These are adorable." She smiled at me and I laughed. 

"I think so too, and I'm anti-dress." Cecilia laughed as she entered with Viper on her arm. 

"I think we make a handsome couple." 

"I think so too," I lied, "let's get to the reception before we're all late."

"I'm taking my bike." Viper spit as he walked out the door. 

"Alright." Cecilia said, "Girls ride." 

"I guess so." Savannah said as we climbed back into my car and headed for the reception hall. I grinned at them and we headed off. I gave Savannah a curt nod and she knew what I meant by it. It implied that I was ready. When we arrived, everybody was there, including Viper. He was in the back at the bar, drinking down each of his sorrows and hate influenced feelings. My mother and Blake twirled elegantly and I eyed the cake. It was exactly as the picture showed it. Large, with the right colors and glitzy. My mother would be pleased, and I was glad for that fact. I was going to ruin her entire wedding with a hundred words or less. My cousin got up and proposed a toast, and I decided that would be the method of execution. The crowd was loud as she finished, and I nodded to Savannah. She excused herself and I watched her until she reached the door. I clinked my cup and the laughter and the noise died quickly. I looked around the room and swallowed hard. 

"I'd like to propose a toast," I raised my glass and looked around the room at the various expressions staring back up at me, "I'd also like to take this opportunity to clear something up." The room silences and every set of eyes were on me. I met a few of them before I had the courage to even talk again. "First off, I want to say congratulations to the bride, I love you mom." I gulped and looked at my brother who was trying his hardest to keep his eyes averted from mine and focused on the tall glass of wine he was illegally drinking. "The rumors are true," I looked from my brother to CeCe, who looked extremely terrified, "I think- I mean, I know I'm head over heels in love with my brother's girlfriend." Gasps echoed through the room, and whispers began to make me feel more worried than ever. "Enjoy the rest of the reception." I waved towards the DJ, who turned the music back up. I avoided the hands reaching for me through the crowd or the congratulations and 'lesbian' comments and headed straight for the bathroom. I was sure I was about to throw up. I threw the door back and headed into the stall. I kneeled and gulp, gasped and puked. 

"Vivian?" I heard the voice, and recognized it. 

"Yes?" I asked between gags.

"Can I come in?" 

"Yeah." I said as I puked again. The stall slid open, and my father stepped into view. He cupped his hands on my cheeks and held my face from the throw up and flushed it. He helped me to my feet and brought me to the sinks. He wet a papertowel and dabbed at my face to clean the ruins of my sweat and vomit. He smiled sadly. 

"That was very brave of you." He handed me my toothbrush and toothpaste. 

"How'd you know I'd need this?"

"I puke when I'm nervous too." He smiled. "You get it from me." I turned to the sink and brushed my teeth hard, and scrubbed my tongue. 

"Viva?" Another voice asked in an angry tone and I groaned. I spit my toothpaste into the sink and then handed them back to my father.

"That sounds feminine, you better bolt."

"Come find me after?" 

"Yeah, of course." He left and Cecilia took his place. 

"First off, are you okay?"

"Yeah?" I said.

"Good, that leads me to my next question. What the fuck!?" I said nothing, just grabbed her face and kissed her. She fought me then leaned into me and kissed me back. I kept her face in my hands and smiled as she drew back. She smiled back, and licked her lips. "Is there something I don't know?" She whispered.

"There's a bit." I said and she sat on the sink. 

"I have time." 

"Well," I started, "I'm not going to deny you the right to know. First, I want to ask a question."

"Go ahead?"

"Do you love me?"

"Yes." She said without heistation and I took it for a good sign. My throat clamped and then I smiled.

"I set this up," I said slowly, "becuase I'm selfish and bitter."

"Go on."

"Savannah's outside collecting Viper right now."

"Okay?" She wasn't following and I realized how wrong it was. 

"Viper and Savannah kissed while you were on a break. I told you to get with Viper before I knew Savannah liked him for real. He said he loved her, but it might have been drunk nerves. So, I set this up to let him know. And, becuase, well. I do love you, more than you'll ever know. If you want to walk from me right now and never come back, I understand." I said, knowing I didn't want her too. She smiled sadly and took my face in her hands again and kissed me gently. I smiled and kissed her back,  hugging her to me tightly. She towered over me in her heels and I realized it. Her chest was against mine and I loved the feeling of her heart exploding on mine. 

"I love you too," she said, "I don't want to go anywhere. I want you."

"Well, in about ten minutes you can be mine." She cried then, and I wiped her tears from her eyes. 

"You're more than the world to me Viva," she said, "and I'm glad this is happening. It's for the best. I was with someone I wasn't sure I loved. I knew I loved his sister, all along." 

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