❝AMONG THE MIDST OF THE EMOTIONS RISING
in his soul and trying to regulate his heart rate
and his breathing, paul couldn't help but wish
for one thing: god, i hope i remember this
tomorrow.❞
𝐩𝐚𝐮𝐥...
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Sex isn't that big of a deal, Theodora thought as she walked herself home from Mick's house.
It was a matter-of-fact sort of thing. No fanfare. No silk sheets. No rose petals or jazz albums lulling on the radio.
It wasn't a bad thing, necessarily. Theo didn't feel like she'd lost out on anything. There were no missed opportunities for her to mourn.
Virginity is a social construct anyway, Theo thought to herself as she scuffed her black boot on the cement below her feet.
That was true, but still -- why couldn't she shake the sinking feeling that she'd been used?
**
Mick was so sweet, Theo knew that. Mick had a big heart and soft hands. He knew what he was doing, which was a good thing because she had no clue what any of this would entail.
Theo had voiced her concern, the fear not allowing for her voice to get any louder than it already had been (and it wasn't very loud at all).
"Mick, I'm a -- a --" her voice failed her and her hands were trembling like they never had before.
Mick arched an eyebrow and tried to reach for his girlfriend, not completely sure with what was wrong.
"You're what?" he asked, pressing open-mouthed kisses all along her jawline and neck.
Theo swallowed her pride and figured Mick should have known. It wouldn't hurt -- besides, maybe he would be tender and kind?
"A virgin."
Mick pulled away, almost as though he was afraid he would burn her.
"Really?"
She couldn't help the exasperated sigh that came out of her. Like she'd make something like that up. Honestly.
"Yes."
He took her hands in his and looked at her, waiting for her to glance back at him before he asked her the million dollar question.
"Theo, are you sure you want to do this?"
There wasn't a hesitation. She was scared, but she wanted it.
She wanted him and all of him, too.
"Yes."
**
Of course, it ended all too quickly. It was nice enough and she enjoyed herself but just -- why the hell was Theo walking herself home?
She figured it was some sort of curse given to her grandmother to be carried through the generations. Each Embry woman would be fated to fall for the decidedly wrong person. The beauty of the moon and stars would reflect in their eyes, but sin would run wild in their hearts.
Theo remembered the way her mother's face would scrunch up in a sort of pain whenever she'd ask about her dad. It wasn't as though she'd missed the man that she never knew.
It was something she'd accepted. Some kids had dads. Some didn't.
Her mother wasn't easily convinced.
Justene would talk in a flourish, hands flailing every which way and her voice both raising and lowering octaves as she exclaimed that everyone needs a father. It was normal! It was helpful! It would have made her life a whole lot easier.
When she was younger, all Theo could do was sit back and watch her mother say those things. There was simply no stopping her when she got like this, and especially being 8, it was hard to fathom the fact that her mother felt anything other than happy.
Now, being older, whenever her mom's eyes would gloss over like that, Theo tried so hard to change the subject. She would blurt out anything about history or the weather -- anything to get her mom to avoid the garden path lined with thorns that led to Theo's father.
So very much had changed since she was 8, but the utter helplessness she felt while watching her mother cry hadn't.
The curse had Justene in its clutches.
The little hazel-eyed girl used to think that she was going to break the curse. Theo would show the cruel universe that she could have the shiny, bright, nice things she wanted. She had a big, soft cotton-candy heart but it seemed to have dissolved.
Everything seemed to have dissolved.
Theodora Embry wasn't a girl who deserved those sorts of things.
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SIX THOUSAND READS ??? WHERE ARE YOU ALL COMING FROM
i also feel like i keep writing all these a/ns where i'm shook because of how many people are reading/voting/commenting on this story but ! i ! can't ! believe ! it !
thanksss so much~
poor miss theo :/ things aren't going to get much better for our beautiful lil princess (not for a while ofc bc i am the queen of darkness)
(only 90s kids remember that nickname)
ALSO WHO HERE... STANS BTS ANYONE? anyone?
"no halle"
oh well u should bc hobi/hoseok/j-hope/the light of my LIFE dropped his mixtape a couple of days ago and i'm scalped
true talent
SPEAKING OF TALENT i have none but yall are all amazing and sweet so thank u for the support (again!!!!)
