As soon as Bodak Yellow came on, Nicki dramatically threw herself on the ground. "MAKE IT STOP!" she pleaded, bringing false tears to her eyes.
"Bitch, if you don't shut the fuck up."
Nicki looked up to see who just told her that, and she was eye to eye with Cardi. She quickly got off the ground.
"So, I heard you been selling drugs to them Fifth Harmony girls." Cardi eyed Nicki up and down condescendingly.
Nicki did the same, crossing her arms and tapping her feet. "Yeah, so what?"
Cardi cackled, but not as loudly as Nicki's typical laugh. "That's pretty shitty."
Nicki clicked her tongue. "You're laughing at me for selling drugs? Bitch you're the one selling pussy! TUH!" Queen Onika Tanya Maharaj turned on the heel of her Fenty slides and walked off.
"Not so fast, bitch!" Cardi grabbed Nicki by her pink weave and pulled her to the floor.
Ty stepped up to seperate them, but a hand pulled him back.
"Nuh-uh." Danielle Bregoli snickered. "If they kill eachother off, then I'll be the top female rapper of our generation, Tyrone. Do you know what this means?!"
Ty raised one of his brows. "No?.."
Danielle did that signature, crappy female rapper laugh. "NYEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHRHSHFHSHFHHDDJFHDURH! It means, I can kick you, Fourth Harmony AND that Colgate Cocaine bitch off the charts!"
"Why would you want to do that?" Matthew intervened.
Danielle's face got into that scary bitch mode shit thingy that she does. "BECAUSE MONEY, YOU IDIOT!"
Then the couple carried on an argument with the 14 year old for a loooooong dic-time. I meant time. Yeah, so anyways, they argued for like eleven minutes.
In the far corner of the house, there was a coffee table with a blunt, and a heap of cocaine on it.
"Now, I'll show you how it's done." Camila dipped her pinky finger into the white power and licked it off. Then she stood up, got some distance from the table and stood there.
"Umm, what are you doing?" Lauren nervously laughed as she saw Camila rubbing her hands.
Without answering, Crackhead dived onto the table, headfirst.
Lauren coughed as some of the crack flew on her face. "CAMILA, WHAT THE FUCK?" she looked over the table to see Camila lying down on the floor with a nosebleed, grinning for absolutely no reason.
"MY BITCH LUH DO COCAINE! PRRT!" Lil Pump yelled from the doorframe.
Camila waved weakly at the mophead. "Sup."
Pump sat down on the carpet next to Camren and sighed. "I want a church girl that go to church aNd rEAd hEr bIBLe.." he was sad, and frowny.
Then suddenly, Ally burst through the wall. "BIBLE? WHERE?!" the holy Allysus began to jump around the room.
Mophead gasped. "Do you go to church and rEAd yOur bIBLe?"
Ally nodded frantically before tackling Lil Pump. "LET'S GET MARRIED AT CHURCH, THIS INSTANT!"
One hour later.
The priestess, Dinah Jane, stood at the altar with the Bible in her hand.
"Do you, Allyson Brooke Hernandez, take Lil Pump to be your dearly beloved husband, through sick and health, through rich and broke, through flops and topping the charts?"
Ally nodded and smiled in her wedding dress, at the love of her life.
Lil Pump smiled back at his beautiful church girl.
"And do you, Lil Pump, retweet everything I just told your wife?" the priest asked the groom.
Pump nodded. "Esketit."
Dinah smiled lovingly. "You may now kiss the bride."
Lil Pump lifted the Gucci veil off Ally's face and kissed her lovingly.
The church audience cheered, smiled, laughed and cried.
Later on, Ally had her back turned to the crowd as she threw a boquet of flowers behind her. When she turned around, she saw Ty holding it up with a proud grin.
"OH MY GOD, BABE WE'RE GETTING MARRIED!" Matthew squealed and kissed his boyfriend.
The remaining crowd erupted into a bunch of 'Aww's at the display of affection.
"Now let's go to our Honeymoon, my wife." The newlywed husband told his wife and climbed into the backseat of a limosuine with her.
Drake pulled down the driver's window. "Onika, you coming?"
Ninki Minjaj dived through the window and into the front seat. "Fuck does it look like?"
The rest of Fifth Harmony, and Tytthew got into the limo. Then it sped off into (<ayyy that was the 727th word lmao) Cuba. Don't ask me how that was possible, thanks.
