Outcast Angelfish (Book 1)

Astaroth.

"Im a bit worried" I tell Lukas.

I was still in his arms.

"I dont know what other people will think about this."

"Everybody hates me.... It's bad for you" Lukas tells me

"Jess what the fuck are you doing?"

We both turn around and see Shirley.

There was no turning around now..

"You must know now.." I say

"Jess – she doesnt have to..."Lukas begins

But I immediatly stop him.

"Shirley... do you love me as your big sister?.." I ask her

"Yes of course!.." she replies

Lukas gulps and frowns

"Would you accept me for whoever I am?" I ask her

"Yes" she replies

"Even if I did something you dont want me to do?"

"Yes."

"Are you sure?" I ask

"Yes I am sure." She says

I turn to Lukas slowly and hug him and he softly kisses my forehead.

Shirley takes a deep breath in and then out.

"If you know what you are doing... its alright...." she says.

Lukas hesitantly looks over at Shirley.

"Im sorry if I ever hurt you.. I promise im gonna change..." Lukas says in a shaky voice.

"Hey... you won my sisters heart... im surprised..." Shirley says

He smiles.

" Ye I did.....But she won mine first.... If I did anything right in life it was when I gave my heart to her"

"Okay im going now.." she says

"Stay safe." Lukas tells her

Shirley walks away quietly.

Lukas keeps on looking behind me but looka back at me.

"I didnt think that would be Shirley's reaction." I say

"Me either" he says

"Shirley is so understanding" I say

"She is." he says

"I dont think Anne would be that understanding."

Lukas frowns.

"Anne has a crush on me.. and I hurt her.. Im such an Asshole" He says

"Ill never hurt you Jess... I'm so afraid Jess..." His voice shakes

I didnt have any comforting words.

"Im afraid too..." I say

"Im afraid ill hurt you when Im not me.I can't control myself.. I'm a mess.." He says

"Ill get through it.. and you will learn to control it.." I say but still unsure

He looks at me. He looked as if he was about to cry

"I can never control Raven.. he's the one that keeps on possesing me to hurt you, Jess. " He says

I sigh

" He wants you to be afraid of me." He says

" why does he do that to me?" I ask

"He's not a bad man..." Lukas says "He just doesnt know this side of me"