My Sister's Best Friend (Camren)

Chapter 35 - Only human

Lauren P.O.V

 

I would love to say I’m fine, it’s been two months. Two months I asked for her forgiveness, two months she walked away and never looked back.

 

She ignores me, I try talking to her but she pretends that I don’t exist or maybe I don’t to her anymore cause she sure acts like it.

 

I know what you’re thinking, just forget about her. I wish I could. She’s my first love, the only one I ever found myself falling for and I can’t seem to stop. I’m falling every day and I can’t seem to stable myself no matter how hard I try, I can’t.

 

Even when she hurt me, even though she used me I never stopped loving her, I don’t think I ever will.

 

I know I don’t deserve her forgiveness for what I did to her, I knew she was sensitive, fragile but I was driven by hurt and did the thing that’s my biggest regret right now.

 

A month ago when I knew my mom was truly acceptable of who I am, I told her about my past relationship with Camila. She told me that lately she thought I looked sad so I told her everything.

 

I told her about the first time I asked Camila out on the rooftop to the date at Meagan and Chase’s lake house. To the way she makes me feel to the time I confess I love her then from Camila telling me what we had was a game to what I put her through in school after that and lastly … I told her about New year’s eve night.  But the worst part was. I told her Camila never told me she loved me and that hurt the most.

 

I cried to my mom, I never showed people my weakness but I couldn’t take it anymore, I needed my mother. People put on this brave front, they don’t need anyone, they can’t be hurt but at the end of the day we’re all scared. We have this one thing that appsolutly devastate us and when that hits, it hits hard and there’s no turning back.

 

We all have this little kid inside of us, no matter how old we become we’ll always need someone and what better person than your mom. The very woman that give birth to you cause there’s not one in this world that can understand you like she does. Or maybe there is … maybe there is one more person who gets you better that your mother ever will or maybe it’s just me hoping she does.

 

So as I drive my sister and I to school this morning I can’t help but wonder when Jennel tried pushing me away from Camila because she thought “I’m bad for her” maybe she was right, maybe I should have stayed away from her.

 

“What are you thinking about?” I was snapped out of my thoughts by my sister asking.

 

I shake my head “Nothing” I mumble

 

“Clearly it’s nothing because since we left home you’ve been silent and knowing you that’s rare”

 

After awhile I spoke up “I need to make peace with Camila”

 

As I said that I heard Jennel groan “Lauren just let it go, you’re just hurting the both of you even more”