YUKI-To Move Forward: Prelude 1

Chapter 17: Passing of Time

But he wouldn't wake.

"You need to snap out of it. This isn't healthy, y'know."

On a bench overlooking an empty park, Nicole Minas sighed. She smiled at the icy breath dissipating into the December breeze, and turned back to face me.

I shook my head at the comment.

"What are you talking about? I'm fine. See?" I gave her my best smile.

In response, her smile faded. "I knew it. You aren't fine."

My "best smile" was gone in an instant, and I lowered my head ashamedly. If I couldn't even convince Nicole that I was alright, then how did everyone else see me? What good was I if I couldn't even keep up a smile? What if they found out the truth?

"No."

That one word was all that I could muster up, before I buried my head in my cold, black mittens.

January inched closer, and the snow thickened on the earth. The Barricade radiated a beautiful white during the nighttime, and the falling snow was visible to all. Winter had taken over, and my world became a beautiful nightmare. He who had done so much for me would accept no recompense, and might never again. I could do nothing; I had no influence over his condition, but still I visited. As if I could change his future through my presence alone, I stubbornly visited them day after day. I sacrificed hours of my dreary days to pray that he open his eyes.

Kazuki.

When that name had reached my ears two years ago, it belonged to a shy, uncertain boy who looked just like the others. The eyes of a child. The face of every blade of grass. He looked like just another rail on the track. I smiled and spoke politely, just as I had every other person who spoke to me. Every day, I waited for him to expect more from our relationship, so I could walk away decisively or bore him into leaving.

Kazu.

But then he stayed. Unlike the other rails, he didn't say "hello" and "goodbye." He said "Good day?" and "See you soon." He didn't smile at me, he smiled with me. He didn't laugh unless I was laughing, too. Before long, I began to see my reflection in his eyes.

The promise of solitary life warned me that my past and present would not coexist. I was doomed on a path without connections. There was no future with friends. If they knew what my history harbored, the world would turn on me in an instant. Good, bad, ugly; all would become my enemy.

But I deserved as much when I ran away from the only ones who truly cared. Cruel as they were, they still loved me.

Took you long enough to figure that out.

Still, more days passed by. More time with that coal-eyed boy was spent. More life was experienced with others. And I learned of his troubles.

When I comforted him about his family, I felt solace enter my own heart, and I knew I could stick with Kazu. I realized that we were comfortable around each other in a way I had deemed impossible.

I couldn't help but laugh out loud at how stubborn I had been. My breath froze in midair as the sound resounded through the street. But all I heard was an empty spirit.

After all, he was asleep. So was the one he cared most for.

And the thought made me terribly sad.

As December solemnly left from our lives, a miracle occurred: Rosa's eyes welcomed the light around her. She was extremely weak, but even months spent comatose refused to steal her beauty. After hours of examination, the doctors were relieved to admit that she had not been cursed with amnesia, and was fit to return to her school sometime in the next two weeks. That spark of hope relit the faith that had dimmed in my soul, hope yet of Kazu's recovery. I visited his bed more often, praying with hope now, and every so often the red-haired girl would join me, her beautiful face threatening to burst into tears. As Rosa's condition rapidly improved, the doctors remained intent on assuring me that everything was fine with Kazu, and the time it was taking for him to recover was completely normal. And yet...