I'll Wait For You - NaNoWrimo 2016 [DISCONTINUED]

Brain Dead

“What’s happened?” Mom screeches, running, full tilt, into the room, Serena on her heels, both looking very scared.

“Sit, Mrs. Pieroux.” Dr. Roberts says. She does, next to the bed, and Serena sits next to me, right by my legs, at the foot of the bed. I can’t breathe. “There were some complications…with the surgery.”

“Oh no.” Mom whispers, and Roberts continues.

“She’s not responding to pain stimuli, vocal stimuli, and her eyes aren’t reacting to light. She’s brain dead.”

I look over to my mom to see her staring at the doctor with a blank face.

“I’m so sorry.” He pats my mom on the back, and then leaves immediately.

I put my head in my hands as so many thoughts just blur like crazy.

And it’s Peter’s fault. It’s all Peter’s fault.

Wolves aren’t supposed to be real. It’s just a bedtime story. I’m just dreaming.

The sadness overwhelms me, but silently I’m glad that my tormentor is gone.

“Charlie.” Serena says, trying to bring me back. “It’s okay.”

My mother looks over at her.  Serena stands up, head bowed, and realizing she doesn’t belong, leaves in a flurry of tears and waving hands. My mother doesn’t speak as she stands up and grabs her bag. She leaves the room, rather abruptly,  and I’m left alone, like usual, to grieve.

___

How does one begin to explain what losing a sibling feels like? Well, I know every case is different, but, for me, it almost feels like a relief to not have to wonder anymore about what hair brained scheme she’s up to her neck in next.   All in all, I don’t have much time to grieve before the doctor tells me that her team of surgeons are prepping her for organ transplant.

I spend the next hour or two looking through the papers that say who will get her organs. One kidney will go to a woman in Phoenix who has two young kids and is dying of kidney failure. Her heart will go to a teenage boy in Seattle, who has a chronic heart condition. A lobe of her liver will go to an infant, right downstairs… and I can’t bear to look at the rest.

But I’ll be happy knowing how many people she’s helped. How many lives she’s saved. I can remember when she got her license and she said she wanted to be an organ donor. She said it was simple math. One death equals many lives. I agree.

So, when I got my license, I did the same. She was my role model sometimes, and in others, I was hers.

I check my phone, hoping for a way to relieve my anger at Peter, but I can’t call, and I can’t get mad at Trina for no reason. I call Dad, knowing I have too.

“Daddy?” I say, voice thick with tears.

“Hey, Charlie! I was going to call a couple days ago and wish you a Happy New Years, but –“

And then it finally hits me. It’s a new year. A fresh start.

“Christy’s gone.”

“What do you mean?”

I wish she was here to throw a party now.

I wouldn’t mind. I wouldn’t mind at all