Crestfallen ↬ Carl Grimes (old version)

P R E T E N D

Warmth blooms in my chest and on my cheeks as I let a smile of my own appear on my face, squeezing her small hand that fit perfectly inside my own before releasing my grip on it, chuckling, "Maybe if I had a perfectly good video game in my hands, or a good book, I wouldn't have to stare at you so often."

That, of course, was only half a lie, for video games and stories could only do so much in this world for me. And people like Milah...Well, let's just point out that I'm not really complaining about having found Milah when I did. It's nice of course, to finally have a companion of some sorts after a long time of roaming alone. Once before, I had a friend like her, Sophia, but the memories lacked any sort of uniqueness about them like mine with Milah did. Only card games and homework even in the middle of the apocalypse. And even she had met her brutal end.

"Oh please," the girl chuckles, a small, breathy laugh, "You're too captivated by my beauty to get distracted by foolish things like video games."

Even with her joking tone, it was hard to shake the feeling that this wasn't Milah being...Milah. She was acting as if every single thing that's ever happened to her didn't have any sort of grasp on her emotions. The horrible attack on the roadside...The story of her and that boy...The attack on Terminus... They were only the few memories that I knew about, but even more  were lurking around the depths of her dark eyes but never once did she speak of them on the many days our feet had walked. It was hard not to look at her as if she could shatter at any moment, for that's exactly what she did right after the roadside attack and that man....She couldn't have possibly let it go that easily. Nobody could have. Was it something I needed to worry about? Or should I just embrace it for what it is and enjoy the moments of laughter, forever wondering how genuine it is?

"You're getting lost in my eyes again, Sheriff," another grin, another laugh as the corners of her eyes crinkle, making my heart rise to my throat as her freckled face beamed with the humor laced in her words.

"You wish, Sunshine," I retorted, finally dragging my eyes away from hers to look at the surrounding trees that littered our path, the faint heat in my cheeks easily blamed on the persistent fierceness of the bright sun ahead of us and not on the current conversation.

Maybe it wasn't right to assume the state of Milah's stability. Maybe she was actually happy and just trying to move on from the things she wanted to forget, and I was only being the monster trying to drag her back to those moments. And maybe, just maybe, I was overthinking things just so my own mind didn't have to worry about the actual situation at hand. But would it be such a crime if I was? I had called it from the beginning: Milah was a distraction and it was shown in almost every action she did. Then, I hadn't known how much things would change in such a short time period, but now that I do things have been forced into a different perspective. One thing is for sure, though; It wouldn't be me taking the blame if she burned down the world we once knew and we all went up in flames with it, for almost everyone could see it in her eyes that she had enough power buried in her to do such a thing.

And hopefully, neither I or Judith would be caught in the mass destruction if such things ever came to be.

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(A/N: Here lies my heart and soul due to the fact that Carl called Milah the most basic nickname ever. RIP.)

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"Help!

Help, anybody! Help!"