Critical (Cara Delevingne&Kendall Jenner)

Chapter 24: Posession

Cara

Kendall is the most selfless person I've ever met, and she's willing to do anything to make me happy and to keep me. I've never seen her like this, happy, careless and relaxed.

But she becomes selfish when it comes to me.

Should I say she's posessive? No, that's a heavy word.

But thinking on the other hand; she is posessive.

Last night I went out with Barbara, and Kendall had this worried look in her eyes. Not the one you see when you tell your mom you'll be gone for a few weeks, and she gets all worried what might happen to you. No, this was far from that. She had the look of rage, saddness, and posession.

The look where you can read all the mixed feelings and put them together into one painful feeling.

Posession.

Of course she knows Barbara is only my friend, and I haven't really told her about our past, because she'd get even jealous and more worried.

But would I be jealous if she'd gone out with someone who has potential to hit on her?

Of course I trust her, I know she wouldn't hurt me like this. And we'd just begun our relationship, and from what she's told me and what vibe she's given me, she's no cheater. Everytime she'd look at me a warm feeling would flow through me, and when she would kiss me I could feel her heart rate rise a bit.

That's what love is supposted to feel like.

But her posession is just so annoying, and whenever I ask her if something bothers her, she just says it's no problem and that she'll get over it eventually.

If she says there's no problem, does it really mean it's no problem?

"What's bothering you now?" Kendall says and wraps her arm around my waist to pull me closer. I feel the warmth of her arm flow through my veins and I can't help myself but smile.

"Nothing, I was just thinking."

She kisses my forehead and intertwins our fingers.

"What about?" She asks and stares deeply into my eyes.

Those looks burn their way to my soul in a second.

"To be honest, uh. Your posession kind of bothers me."

Kendall's look suddenly changes from loving to confused. I bite my lip hard at the thought of us arguing, knowing we wouldn't make any progress with that.

"My posession?" She asks with raised eyebrow.

I nod.

"You are so posessive every now and then, Kendall. I feel like you're gonna stalk me when I go out, just to see I won't do anything stupid, or anything to hurt you. It's kind of distracting."

Kendall stares at me for another ten seconds, then closes her eyes and sighs.

"Cara, I'm not posessive. I know it may feel like this every now and then, but that's not posession. It's hard to explain what it feels like when you go out with attractive friends of yours, especially Barbara. It's not that bothers me that you have friends, it just bothers me how attractive they are," she says and turns her eyes away from me.

Are her eyes watering?

I never told her about my and Barbara's past, and I intend it to stay that way, but sometimes Kendall just guesses things on her own.

"So you're afraid I might cheat on you?" I ask with raised eyebrow and disappointed tone in my voice.

Kendall just shakes her head and avoids my stare.

"No. I don't think that, ever. But sometimes I feel like I'm not enough. Like you want more. I keep you waiting when it comes to sex, I have my teenage moments that bother you, sometimes I get mixed feelings, I can't live on my own since I haven't finished high school yet and I can't be employed. Sometimes it really feels like I'm not enough."

By the end of her sentence, Kendall's voice is raspy, shaky. It cracks every now and then. Her hands are shaking, and her eyes are all puffy and red.

I grab her face in my hands and lift her chin. I kiss her lips gently, painfully.

"Kendall, I don't mind if you keep me waiting. I have patience. I don't mind you being a teenager. I chose you on my own. I don't care if you can live yourself or not. You're not old enough for such responsibility. Look at some people; they haven't left home yet, but they're in their thirties. You still have time, and don't worry about any of that. Just please, don't ever think you're not good enough. You are, and you've always been. You're just so young."

Kendall's eyes don't leave mine for the next twenty seconds, and then she slowly leans in for a gentle kiss.

Our lips are always synced. It surprises me how I never experienced that perfection before, and how perfect everything feels when she kisses me, how the reality around us disappeares.

Maybe it's too beautiful to be true.

Kendall's hand touches my heated cheek and gently rubs it. Her breathing fastens through kisses, and her other hand pulls me closer by my waist.

Her hand gently travels from my cheek over my neck to my shoulder and she pulls me even closer. She breaks the kisses and leans her forehead on my forehead.

"I love you so much, I want you to remember that," she whispers and her hot breath hits my barely separated lips.

I bite my lip and pull her in for another kiss.

"I love you too, posessive bitch."

Author's note:

Hey hey!

So this chapter is awfully short, I cut two parts out, as I can't give you everything just yet!
Be patient and you'll get more details on me and my formal English teacher SOON!!!
Love y'all!

-Author