Critical (Cara Delevingne&Kendall Jenner)

Chapter 17: "Let's not do this"

Kendall

Have you ever been so utterly in love with someone that you ended up thinking about them even when you were kissing someone else? Well, I have. Have you ever loved someone so much you would die for them albeit you know they will never feel the same? Well, I have. And have you ever been so sad because someone you loved hurt you without even knowing it? Well, I have.

Jamie is killing me. I know she's probably the most annoying part of my life to my friends but she's crossing my mind way too much. I really want to go past her but she just isn't letting me, everytime I'd stop thinking about her Emily would bring her up or she'd do something or say something about me.

And today is one of those days when I could wish for nothing more or less than to just take the first bus or train or plane to somewhere and just simply disappear. I'm sick of everything and everyone, and my only escape is music.

No more tears, my heart is dry
I don't laugh and I don't cry
I don't think about you all the time
But when I do I wonder why

Sounds like a perfect song about Jamie, for the past six months there's been songs about her and only her. I don't quite understand why am I still thinking about her as much as I do. I know I don't love her anymore but I'll still need some time to forget about her. Like they say, you never forget your first love.

When it comes to Cara we've been friends for some time now. She's really nice and always does things to make me forget about the world even if she doesn't know she does that. And at least there's one good-looking girl that's not straight.

I decide to quickly text her if she wants to hang out. I would really like to talk to her about Cole because it's haunting me that I broke his heart. It wasn't my intention to hurt him but I just needed space from him and I'm feeling way more relaxed now.

'Wanna hang out today?'

She responds withnin minutes which surprises me because she's usually really busy with her teacher work that she doesn't manage to reply soon.

'Sure. When is it okay with you?'

'Whenever you want. I'm free for the whole day.'

'Okay, meet me in the centre in one hour. See ya. Xoxo.'

I quickly put on my denim jeans and tight, plain, white shirt and leave the house. Thank god mom gave me money yesterday so I can pay for the both of us today because I messed up the last time.

_______

I arrive ten minutes early so I decide to give Leah a quick call to see if she's up to go drinking on Friday.

"Lesbo, wanna get wasted on Friday?"

"Sure thing, girl. I just found cognac and vodka under my bed. Is that what we hid from my parents last year?

"Shit, I totally forgot about that! Yeah, that's it. I have some whiskey. Maybe we could empty the whole whiskey bottle?"

"That sounds amazing to me. You gonna sleep over?"

"I'll talk to my parents about it. So it's a plan then."

"It's a plan, yes. So I'll see you on Friday. Can't wait!"

"Me neither." I notice Cara coming my way so I decide to say goodbye to Leah. "Listen, I'll talk to you later. I'll see you, bye."

With that, I hang up and start walking towards Cara.

"It's freezing," she says as she greets me with a tight hug which I gladly return.

"Well, we'll warm ourselves. It's Saturday and the drinks are free tonight. Are you up for tequila?"