Toto and the Boys I: Jackie

Chapter 23

Jackie was very certain it was not the alcohol working to make her hear those words from him. She had not been drinking as promised and she was at the most sober state ever. For a moment, she doubted that one because she felt as if she was in a trance. Everything around seemed to be moving except her and Dean who was looking at her with anxiety.

And the anxiety she saw in his eyes as he tried to look away and then struggle to look back told her that she must have heard right.

“Pursue me?” she hissed, her eyes bulging in shock. She didn’t really intend her reaction to be that way, but she was really blown by his announcement.

Dean lifted one eyebrow in question. “Shouldn’t I?”

Jackie blinked. “Should you?” The frown on his face told her she asked the wrong question. “I mean, why?”

His frown deepened. He looked around the table and when he thought they were not being noticed by everyone, he shifted his position so he was halfway facing her. “I like you. Isn’t that reason enough?”

Jackie blinked a few more times in disbelief. Her boss, the office devil Dean Gamboa just told her he liked her. The band drummer Dean Gamboa wanted to pursue her. “But--”

“You don’t have to answer me back, Jackie. I don’t want half-truths. If the time comes, I want utter honesty from you.”

His statement meant so much in different ways to Jackie. She was hiding something quite big from him. And she wasn’t sure if she wanted this--this “pursuing” thing. Sure, he was hot and he was nice, but she didn’t know a lot of things about him. She wasn’t sure if she was ready to get into another relationship.

But he told her she didn’t have to give him any answers right now. It meant he was willing to wait. And she could use that time to make things right. She should definitely take down that Facebook account for good. And then she had to come clean and tell Dean everything she had done. And maybe, if he learned to forgive her, they could start something together.

“Don’t think about what people in the office would say,” he said, looking her in the eyes. But she was not thinking about the people in the office. The hell with them! The only person in Collins Corporations that she cared the hell about enough to commit murder was Brian. If it was not for him, she didn’t have to have a dilemma at the moment. She could just easily say yes to Dean and enjoy the moments they could create.

But if it was not because of Brian, she might not be here tonight listening to Dean. She could be at home and hating the man for giving her hell in the office.

“So,” Dean said after a long speech that Jackie didn’t even hear, “what do you think? Are you okay with it?”

She raised her brows. “Huh?”

“The dating?”

“Dating?”

He heaved a sigh. “You’re obviously still in shock.”

“Well, I am! I am definitely in shock!” She turned her head to check their friends. They were still oblivious of what was happening between her and Dean.

“Don’t take it big. Just think of this as a special relationship. If you are still uncomfortable with it, then call it a special friendship. We date, I try to pursue you--but don’t think I am good at it because I don’t really like it. I just want to see where this thing between us can go--how far we can make it. Let’s not think too much of the day you will say yes to me or the day I will tell you I love you because they will come if they will. Do you get what I mean?”

She just nodded. This was new to her. When she thought of Dean pursuing her, she was thinking of flowers, balloons, chocolates and dinners. This dating and ‘see where this leads us’ kind of thing was new to her. As a woman, she wanted every T to be crossed and every I to be dotted. She wanted something that would reassure her she would be landing in a safe place. What Dean was proposing was an open sea with no horizon. They could go on sailing forever and not go anywhere.