Victim of Circumstance | UNDER RIGOROUS EDITING

Chapter 38 - Valeria & Pius

My parents were perplexed beyond comprehension. They wanted to know what was happening but I was tongue-tied. No word could leave my tongue even if I wanted to so badly. I was so numb to the extent that I blocked out everything. The only thing I know for sure is the fact I told my parents that he was there. It took them a while to catch on and when they did, hell almost broke loose. My parents identified the perpetrator of my emotional doom as none other than my cousin. My only living cousin. My aunt Sarita's—my mom's sister—only son. Bayron. That's his name.

The person that raped me was my blood relative. The person that destroyed me forever with no return was—is my family. How sick and twisted is that? I feel sick and disgusted and dirty. How could he do that to me? Did he hate me that much? Was it all his mother's doing? Why the hell did he do it?

His voice was familiar. That night. I knew I heard it somewhere but I thought my mind was playing tricks on me. It makes sense now. My mind wasn't making it up because I met him once but no one told me he was family. My parents didn't. My aunt didn't. No one did. And I don't know why. He was an ass with me. The day we met. Hated me for nothing. His eyes only held malice. His words venomous. His demeanor arrogant and miserly. I brushed it off and went about with my life just to find out he's my cousin and my rapist.

God... I can't anymore.

"Please tell me something." I plead softly. "Anything to get my mind off of this. Please."

"Anything like what?" Chantel draws her eyebrows together confusedly. "I don't know—"

"Think." I cut her off harshly. "You're smart. I know you can come up with something. Please come up with something."

"Valeria..." She trails looking all panicky. She's mortified.

"Please?" I whisper. She sighs and turn on her back staring up at the ceiling. "Chantel?"

"I'm thinking." She tells me and keep quiet.

"Okay." I say and also turn on my back.

"Are you okay?" She asks.

"What?"

"I'm asking if you'll you be alright?" She looks at me with a crease on her forehead. "I was scared Valeria. I'm scared for you. I've never seen anyone scream in so much pain. So before I change the topic and come up with something totally unrelated, I want to know if you'll be fine. That you'll be alright because that's all that matters to me now. Your safety sissy. You've been through hell in this few months. So will you be?" She sighs deeply. I don't answer her right away. I take my time before I give her a well thought out answer.

Will I be alright? That's the question I don't know how to respond to because I don't know myself. I have been through pain in just eight to ten months that some people experience in all their seventy blissful years of life.

I was a spoilt brat who hated her parents for nothing. I did all I could to show them just how much and how deep my hatred went. I loved and looked up to a venomous, manipulative aunt that only showed interest in me because I was of some use. I was thrown out of my house. I was living on the streets. Under a bridge for two months surviving on garbage food and sometimes unhygienic water. I begged people to spare me something to survive the day. I slept through thunderous rain and freezing weather in nothing but a thin blanket which didn't even deserve to be called one. I got raped. Lost my virginity as a result to a faceless dog. Someone that's no longer faceless because he has a face now. A name. Bayron. I was pregnant. I got knocked up by my cousin. I struggled with the pregnancy for two months. I almost got raped again by someone who is no longer—Tobi. He didn't make it out of the explosion which I was also part of. Imagine, a building where I was burst up in dust. I lost the baby. I found out my parents which I thought were—are not dead. And that's not mentioning it all. All that happened to me. Me. Did I die from it? No. But it sure as hell was painful. Still is. I'm still experiencing the aftereffects of it all. So if I'm asked if I'll be alright, what's my responds?